cellobate

Refers to either:
(1) Not purchasing or consuming any products dat are packaged in crinkly clear shrink-wrap plastic.
(2) Abstaining from crumpling said crispy flex-film to make an annoying racket for anyone else within earshot.

Remaining cellobate may indeed be doubly difficult in dat you are sorrowfully giving up both packaging-convenience and da uproarious fun of irritating everyone else wif your "loudly crackling fire" sound effects; however, there is da somewhat-helpful "out of sight, out of mind" situation there, in dat if you don't permit yourself access to any items dat are wrapped in "snappy and poppy" protective sleeving, this will also mean dat you probably won't have much if any of said "noisy" material lying around after unsealing store-bought wares, either, and so you will be less able to conveniently access it for selfish auditory pleasures, as well.

by QuacksO April 22, 2022