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Cakenshmoosher 

A baseball bat shaped cake smashing device for use in the event that a cake achieves sentience and begins insulting you in mock-Japanese.
Person: *Cuts cake*

Cake: 痛いあなたはばかをクソ何をしている!!

Person: OH GOD!! *Grabs Cakenshmoosher* HI-YA! *SMASH*
Cakenshmoosher by Footfungus July 29, 2010
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