A Nigel 

A situation where, after a sensible comment has been made, the receiver understands little or none of the comment or its context. Often ending up in a lengthy re-examination of the original comment at great distress to the issuing party.

The act of following a perfectly valid comment that would ordinarily spark debate with an idiotic question, thus derailing the entire conversation.

1.
Peter: "I just heard in the news that oil prices are soaring."
Steve: "What?"
Peter: "I said I just heard that oil prices are soaring."
Steve: "Why?"
Peter: "I just read it in the news, I'm trying to find out why."
Steve: "the government do that to the property market."
Peter: "Are we still talking about oil prices?"
Stever: "What?"
Peter: "Stop being a Nigel!"

2.

Peter: "I just came up with a way of solving world peace for all humanity."
Steve: "Why?"

A Nigel by ConcernedandConfusedFriend January 24, 2011

'A Nigel' 

Doing 'A Nigel' mean leaving a place, party, town or anywhere without saying goodbye to your close friends.

"Make sure when you move you don't do 'A Nigel'"

"Can't believe He did 'A Nigel' the other night! What a party pooper!"

'A Nigel' by it will rain hard on you November 27, 2011

a nigel danger wank

Nigel was in his bedroom and he shouted downstairs, Mum(deceased and rotten) call the fucking police there's a madman with a set of steak knives hacking me to pieces. As soon as nigel heard her scream he dropped his trousers and commenced the danger wank. As nigel heard mummy stomp up the stairs nigel knew he had to be quick so he upped the pace, as nigel heard her stumble on the top step, which bought him some time. Unfortunately nigel timed his finish badly. As nigels mum barged through the door armed with a rolling pin nigel chugged all over mummy. nigel spent the evening in A&E with concusion.

a nigel danger wank job

a nigel danger wank by mrs tosser October 6, 2025

a nigel danger wank.. 

a nigel danger wank
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Nigel was in his bedroom and he shouted downstairs, Mum(deceased and rotten) call the fucking police there's a madman with a set of steak knives hacking me to pieces. As soon as nigel heard her scream he dropped his trousers and commenced the danger wank. As nigel heard mummy stomp up the stairs nigel knew he had to be quick so he upped the pace, as nigel heard her stumble on the top step, which bought him some time. Unfortunately nigel timed his finish badly. As nigels mum barged through the door armed with a rolling pin nigel chugged all over mummy. nigel spent the evening in A&E with concusion.

a nigel danger wank.. splat

a nigel danger wank.. by mrs tosser October 7, 2025

a nigel BD party

Nigel's wheelchair covered in balloons

a nigel BD party

a nigel BD party by mrs tosser October 16, 2025

a nigel version game fully employed

buying and selling children's 50p panini football cards via ebay. slight pedo connotations

a nigel version game fully employed cool

a nigel version game fully employed by mrs tosser October 16, 2025

a nigel suicide speed wank

when your having a wank just before blowing your mayonnaise load, shout out Mum!!!!(diseased and rotting). bring my dinner up please, then try and finish the job before she gets into your room

a nigel suicide speed wank cool

a nigel suicide speed wank by mrs tosser October 19, 2025