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a monkey fucking a football 

The first time I ever heard this saying was on a construction site where I continued to hear it quite regularly. Basically it means fucking something up. Trying to do something that may require a little bit of skill,experience or coordination and fumbling around with it and not getting it right. Picture a monkey all excited trying to get a hold of a football so he could hump it.
When my wife was trying to change her wiper blades she looked like a monkey fucking a football.

a monkey fucking a football 

1. Someone who dose not pays any attention to what is going on around them.
2. Someone one with no logic or common sense.
shannon your like a monkey fucking a football.

many a monkey 

Term that describes a large quantity of monkeys.
Wow, that zoo had many a monkey!

i'll be a monkey's uncle 

This idiom is used to express complete surprise, amazement or disbelief.
e.g. Bob: Hey, there was a news article about an alien spaceship having entered the earth's atmosphere!
Harry: Well, i'll be a monkey's uncle!

curl a monkey tail

Taking a nice long dump without stopping to pinch off
Dude, after that T-bell I had to curl a monkey tail something fierce!
curl a monkey tail by A^C July 27, 2006

Throw a monkey 

The act of separating a disgustingly repulsive female from her highly attractive female friend in order to give your buddy a much better chance of initiating a sexual encounter with the attractive girl. If the unattractive friend was still around she would likely be doing copious amounts of cock blocking and being generally unsightly and annoying, which would not bode well for your friends efforts and ultimate goal of penetration, and is in fact the reason why most monkeys are thrown.

Throwing a monkey is a sacrifice you are making for your friend and can be accomplished in many ways. Throwing a monkey for someone is a highly respectable act and lets people know that you are unselfish, reliable, and when it comes crunch time you can come through in the clutch. You will likely get at least one favor in return for successfully throwing a monkey.

This term is in relation to throwing a monkey in Call of Duty Black Ops Zombie mode, which in dire situations you throw to force the ugly zombies that you know are about to be a potential problem or that are annoying you to remove themselves from your immediate location and follow the monkey so you can do something satisfying like hit the mystery box or upgrade your ray gun. Monkeys are often thrown when you need to revive a friend to help him get back into action.
1.

Garrett: "Yo dude I think I might have that hot ass girl in the bag I've been talking to tonight, but her ugly ass friend won't leave her side so I can really start spitting my A game and seal the deal, can you throw a monkey for me?"

Foster: "Yeah dude, I'll go talk to her and get her to follow me to the other bar upstairs and buy her some drinks."

Garrett: "Thanks man I owe you one"

2.

Foster: "Yo dude I need you to throw a monkey for me man asap"

Garrett: "I got you dawg, you helped me out last time. I'm gonna slip my wallet in her coat pocket secretly and tell the bouncer i saw her steal it off of the counter and make sure she gets kicked out, no worries man I got your back"
Throw a monkey by V queezy January 17, 2011
More from Urban Dictionary

Frothability 

The measure of an emotional and over zealous consumer in an upwardly charging market, also known as a bull market. It's characterized by rising asset prices, increased investor confidence, and favorable growth in the markets, bro.
The frothability was evident as over-zealous consumers eagerly engaged in bidding wars, driving property prices to unsustainable levels reminiscent of previous speculative bubbles.
Frothability by cptn.kagaroo1 January 26, 2024
Word of the Day on November 12, 2026

Soul digger

A man who dates women with the sole purpose of exploiting their time, energy, and labor while he sucks the joy and happiness from their lives.
"That guy's a soul digger. He'll expect you to work full time, but you'll be doing all the cooking, cleaning, laundry, shopping, and childcare while he plays video games or watches TV."
Soul digger by anonymous November 11, 2026
Word of the Day on November 11, 2026

pod person 

A person pretending to be something they aren't, or an impostor. This is inferred because of the old alien movies where alien pods appear on earth and the "pod people" dispose of the humans and slowly reproduce the bodies, pretending to be humans.
The pod person was pretending to be my father, but I knew that he was an alien when he acted differently than my father ever would have.
pod person by Christopher M. May 9, 2005
Word of the Day on November 10, 2026
A dead drop is a location used to secretly pass items between two people, without requiring them to meet.

Spies have been known to use dead drops, using various techniques to hide the items and to signal that the drop has been made. Drug dealers use this as well.

A common place is to duct tape the item to the underside of a toilet cover in a public restroom.

A signal is sometimes used as well to indicate there is something to pickup, like a pile of stones in a certain formation. After checking the drop the signal is removed.
"The dead drop is the restroom toilet at the Gulf station at the corner of Commercial Ave. and Georges Rd."
dead drop by rubberroom July 23, 2008
Word of the Day on November 9, 2026

No Surprises Wedding

A "No Surprises Wedding," or NSW, is a wedding invitation designation that tells attendees that there can be no unplanned announcements, engagements, events or speeches at the wedding - all actions must be pre-approved by the couple. Anyone who performs an unapproved "surprise" will be asked to leave the wedding early.

This designation comes from Reddit, where so many stories of bad wedding behavior indicated a need to communicate expectations for the wedding behavior of attendees.
You are cordially invited to the nuptials of Brian and Tom on October 31 at noon.

Please note that this wedding is child-free (under 10) and a No Surprises Wedding (NSW). Reach out to wedding planner Sami Smith to request approvals or exceptions; please note that exceptions will be rare. Limited child care for under-10s will be available. All approvals will be noted and included in planning. Unapproved, or surprise exceptions, will result in guests being asked to leave.
Word of the Day on November 8, 2026
Ulzzang true definition is "best & "face" = best face in korean. They are basically people with above average looks, sometimes with the use of photoshop and haduri who post their pics online, some becoming internet celebrities.
"Hey, see that chick over there? She's pretty enough to be an ulzzang. :D"
ulzzang by `r i k kit t y February 26, 2008
Word of the Day on November 7, 2026
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