Microsoft Store Salesperson: You'd like this Sony Vaio notebook, sir?
Computer Buyer: Yes. Core i5, 8 gigs of RAM, sounds really nice.
Salesperson: It also come with Windows 8. On Windows 8 you'll have access to hundreds of new "apps". It's really great.
Buyer: Oh, I don't want that. I just want to use iTunes and Firefox.
Salesperson: You can do that on Windows 8, sir. Just click on the "Desktop" icon.
Buyer: *playing around with the store model* Oh, okay, well.... wa... where is the Start Menu?
Salesperson: It was replaced with the new Start Screen. There you have access to all of your applications, just like the old Start Menu.
Buyer: Alright, well, how do I go to the Control Panel?
Salesperson: It's really easy. All you do is right-click the desktop and choose Screen Resolution, and then just click a few other categories and you'll find it. To change the Start Screen applications and personalization you just use its own control panel in the Start Screen.
Buyer: ...Is this notebook compatible with Windows XP?
Salesperson: (mentally) *FFFFUUUUUUUU*
by trwitter October 25, 2012
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Windows 8 is the worst Microsoft software ever because it is so non-user friendly. Why would
I want to save my documents to the cloud?
Windows 8 is much worse than Windows 7 because of how the software is designed.
by PWS27 June 3, 2017
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An absolute mess. The task manager in 7 is replaced with an oversized, metro-ified pile of junk with too many tabs and the font is oversized and blue. The once-convenient start menu has been replaced with an ugly, unconventional, intrusive, oversized startscreen that adds nothing new except for apps that can be jewed from Micro$haft's App Store. More annoyances like the Charms bar, get in the way as well. The charms bar serves no purpose but to pop out when you don't want it to, as well as interfere with the desktop environment and take up another process in the background. The windowing theme is good, if you like to step backwards. The colors of the Aero windowing seemed glossy and pretty, and Windows 8 killed that with flat and unfinished windowing. Also, if you like to use a laptop/desktop with a mouse, like a normal person, you will get the luxury of sliding a wallpaper up upon login, as if you were on a tablet. Convenient. Windows 8 also bothers and nags you to create a Micro$haft account, as if there is a use for one. Remember Dropbox? OneDrive pops up, and needs to be uninstalled via control panel, long with several other bloat apps that come preinstalled such as: Weather, Food & Drink, and Xbox.
"I took a Windows 8 yesterday, it was the size of a squirrel."
by borat420 December 23, 2014
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The only operating system that makes Windows Vista seem good. It is just a desktop operating system derived from a cell phone operating system. It may be somewhat fast, but that's because it can't do anything.
by F-Windows-8 February 9, 2012
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Windows 8 is the next generation of Microsoft's Operating System family and its basically a virus that turns any capable, powerful desktop computer into a worthless pile of crap. Its a phone interface on top of a duller Windows Desktop but with some features also removed! :D The start menu disappeared by magic so its really good at making it harder than ever to find your files! :)

I have always wanted to spend ages getting to the work I need on my PC and thankfully Microsoft listened to my cry!

I also just love how it makes me feel like a kid again while I'm trying to get professional work done and the sad face on the blue screen of death is much more useful than actual technical information on the error!

Thanks a bunch Microsoft! There is no way in hell that I've deleted Windows and moved to Linux now :)
Idiot: Yo dawg herd bout dat cool new os Windows 8 its totally awesome!
Someone: Yes I had the developer preview a year ago... sucked then and sucks now... hate to be you man...
by brianmillar9 November 3, 2012
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1) The next Windows Vista

2) Windows Phone 7 for computers.

3) Microsoft's next operating system that should run on desktops or tablets. It will have 2 different interfaces. Neither interface will run apps compatible with the other interface, and will ultimately lead into a huge failure.

4) 15+ gigabytes of code for what Linux could have done with 4-5 gigabytes.
p1: Hey, I love Windows 8. It looks just like windows should have been in 2007. And it will run on tablets.

p2: YEAH RIGHT. You know it's just a phone OS for desktop right?

p1: Really? But it will have a new interface and new apps store and everything.

p2: But the new interface won't run your old apps, and the app store will be more bolted down that Apple's app store.
by Reiden September 28, 2011
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The only Windows operating system that is both less capable than Vista and Mac OS X. It "runs" better than many other versions of Windows, which was achieved by removing the capability of using applications.

After a fan threatened to say the name "Steve Jobs", Bill Gates released Windows 8.1, which restored the ability to download apps and the Desktop, although apps still did not actually do anything)

There is a legend that more information about this operating system may be located under Bill Gates' solid gold toilet in Redmond, but no one remembers any of this information.
Person 1: My Windows 2-in-1 runs Windows 8!
Person 2: What does it do?
Person 1: It shows pretty icons!
Person 2: YOU ************* ******** ******* ******* REPUBLICAN ******** *** ******** ************** IDIOT ********* **** ************** HIPPO-******** ***** *********** MINION! WHY ARE YOU SO GULLIBLE!!!!!
Linux User: Both of you are idiots. And by the way, I just stole your SSID, credit card, driver's license, and passport.
by DrumpfForPOTUS March 12, 2016
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