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the wife

A nickname for the girlfriend of a friend who has him seriously pussy-whipped.
Neil: "Yo Bob let's hit up the strip club tonight, I hear they have 2-for-1 lapdances."
Bob: "No...uh...I can't. My...uh...girlfriend and me are gonna have a threesome with this hot-ass chick, dude, it's gonna be awesome."
Neil: "Shut up. Everyone knows the wife wouldn't let you do that." (whip cracks)
Bob: "Yeah...we're actually...uh...knitting."
by Nick D February 26, 2004
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The Wife

When you have a partnership as in a business and all partners are equal but there is always someone who has a little more control than the others and that is the wife of the partnership. Term also works in other groups such as friendships, etc.
All 13 partners have an equal share in the company, but everyone knows Mr. Smith is the wife.
by Clovis NL October 22, 2008
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The wife and kid

I know you are having a wonderful time in Fiji, but don't forget to come back home to the wife and kid...
by Richard Stratton September 24, 2015
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Salute the wife

When a lower enlisted salutes the wife of an officer, he/she is signaling that they would like to participate in sexual relations, typically with the officer involved or observing.

Wives of officers asking or insisting a lower enlisted to salute them (which no civilian is owed from anyone) are signaling that they desire the enlisted person to engage in sexual activity with them.
Corporal O’Reilly told me he was going to salute the wife of Major Burns. Now he tells me he’s got a “special assignment” for the Major later tonight.
by MyDogEli September 7, 2020
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How's the Wife?

A question male colleagues used to ask back in the old days before you could just go to Facebook and see all the details of how everyone's wives are doing.
How's the wife?

She's doing fine, thanks.

Not according to her status update this morning she isn't.

Well then what did you ask me for, you @#$%!
by teemo1 January 16, 2011
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Painting the wife's closet

The act of ejaculating inside the vagina.
I got home from work the other day and was feeling pretty rowdy so I took a chance at painting the wife's closet.
by Bus doctor January 23, 2015
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shake hands with the wife's best friend

I'm gonna go to the restroom and shake hand's with the wife's best friend.
by sloppy Joe April 30, 2003
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