Sorry, I'm American
The most useful excuse you will ever have when visiting a foreign land. Gives you almost instant leeway to be rude, ignorant, or just all around screw with foreign peoples mind. Because most countries expect so little brain power from us, why not use that to our advantage, hmm?
ex 1;
Mike: *spills steaming hot coffee all over French guys lap*
French Guy: OW! Wat ze' hell?
Mike: Sorry dude, I'm American.
French: Oh, well zat explainz zvery' thing. *
ex 2;
Mike: *steals a Australian guys taxi cab*
British Guy: Oi! Who the bloody 'ell do yew think you AHHre?
Mike: Sorry dude, I'm American.
British Guy: Bloody figures... Might as well naut even botha' then. *stomps off*
Mike: America: 2, World: 0 *snickers victoriously*
ex 3;
Mike: *snags the sandwich off a Japanese guys plate and takes a bite*
Japanese Guy: Ayy yaahhh! Who you think you are, rude person?
Mike: *slowly* Me sorry, I'm Ammmerricaaannn.
Japanese Guy: *scowls and stands up walking off* Stewpid Amarakins', no manner, no honna'!]
Mike: I reiterate, America: 3, World:0. *smiles and takes another bite*
(Offensive outlook on accents intended. Sorry, I'm American. :])
Mike: *spills steaming hot coffee all over French guys lap*
French Guy: OW! Wat ze' hell?
Mike: Sorry dude, I'm American.
French: Oh, well zat explainz zvery' thing. *
ex 2;
Mike: *steals a Australian guys taxi cab*
British Guy: Oi! Who the bloody 'ell do yew think you AHHre?
Mike: Sorry dude, I'm American.
British Guy: Bloody figures... Might as well naut even botha' then. *stomps off*
Mike: America: 2, World: 0 *snickers victoriously*
ex 3;
Mike: *snags the sandwich off a Japanese guys plate and takes a bite*
Japanese Guy: Ayy yaahhh! Who you think you are, rude person?
Mike: *slowly* Me sorry, I'm Ammmerricaaannn.
Japanese Guy: *scowls and stands up walking off* Stewpid Amarakins', no manner, no honna'!]
Mike: I reiterate, America: 3, World:0. *smiles and takes another bite*
(Offensive outlook on accents intended. Sorry, I'm American. :])
Sorry, I'm American by LocustOfTheNile666 February 25, 2011