a splatt is carl sayles word for a vagina it originates from liverpool and generally is a crude attempt to make girls laugh for example " get your splatt out girl"
1. Explosive diarrhea that is excreted with fire-hose-like ferocity thus splattering the entire toilet pan. Usually an extremely discomforting experience producing loud sounds. Mostly accompanied by a nauseatingly stenchful odour on par with a Hump-back-dinga.
This happens when you have a severe cold or nasal infection. Your last tissue has disintegrated, your handkerchief is a congealed lump, which should be incinerated to avoid it becoming a hazard to public health, and your nose is blocking up. There is nothing for it but to blow your nose the old-fashioned way. This consists in closing each nostril in turn, with a finger, and snorting vigorously out through the other. The product of this exercise is a snot splatter. Although snot may be a misnomer as the product is usually a mixture of snot, pus and airborne detritus that makes the faecal emissions of a diseased crow’s arse seem positively pleasant in comparison.
It can also be used as a noun to describe the sort of person whose presence makes people instinctively shrink away from them, leave the room as quickly as possible to go through a complete biological decontamination routine.
I snorted out a really noxious snot splatteryesterday; I watched it for a bit to see if it moved, I think it did.
Sticking "Thing One" and "Thing Two" into the mouth of the blindfolded female participant of an MMF threesome, and trying to climax before she can recite the entirety of Dr. Seuss' "Cat in the Hat" from memory.
A half joke. A splatchy is when you jokingly make a proposition. When you ask a question jokingly because you don't think others will accept it, but you are actually serious. Has been picking up momentum in recent years.
Bill: "what's up monica?"
Monica: "wanna go make out?"
Bill: "what the fuck!?"
Monica: "chill bill, it was a splatchy"
Bill: "wanna cum in oval office?"
Charlie: "wanna take some shots?"
Alan: "no charlie, it's 9am"
Charlie: "chill out Alan, it was a joke"
Alan: "I don't think it was a joke, Charlie, you're an alcoholic"
Charlie: "damn, it was a splatchy"