similie: very red, like the peri-rectal appendage of the great ape of the african continent on heat. As if one has had an extremely hot curry and stripped their ring.
After i shagged that bitch dry my cock was as red as a baboon's arse!
Driver: But officer, the lights were amber!
Cop: Bullshit mother fucker! It was red as a baboon's arse!
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.