When you sell your house and/or get fired from your janitor job but still continue to give money and support to a younger woman who does not fuck you and even squanders the resources on her playfully abusive ex boyfriends.
A horrifying (and totally real) injury in which you literally snap your dick in half, as you can guess, this can only happen when your penis is erect, if you're a man and you don't wince from reading this, you're either tough as balls or a woman
Poor Hank has never been the same since he suffered a penile fracture, from what I hear, he needs to use a tube if his wife wants to have sex now
An involuntary muscle spasm located in the male genitalia. This spasm can last for two to seven seconds, and causes can include sexual stimulation, sexual over-stimulation, urination, electric shock, or extraneous sensory perception. No medical attention is required, although you should contact your doctor if you experience a penile flutter lasting longer than four hours, or if redness or discomfort occur.