Ponteland is a small semi-rural village located 9 miles North West of the glorious city Newcastle Upon Tyne. Ponteland is what would be considered an upper-middle-class area in the UK. It is connected to a large and extremely expensive housing estate Darras Hall, home to many footballers from the surrounding North East clubs and people who can only be described as Cashmere Trash.
Mummy and Daddy's money, second-hand Porsches, an elderly generation of snobs, ridiculous house prices and the automatic assumption that your child will go to Oxford or Cambridge define Ponteland. Yet it is still labeled as a wonderful place to live as is Darras Hall. Maybe it is a wonderful place to live but several decaying schools, the Chav filled Merton Way "shopping center" and a former council housing estate filled with what the prestigious people of Ponteland would call "salt of the earth" residents suggest against this.
In summary; Ponteland has the image of being middle class and civilized, but that couldn't be further from the truth. It is a shithole in its own right, dominated by social pressure, former criminals and the fear of not being accepted by your following middle-class brethren.
There's always someone doing better than you in Pontleland.
JC
Mummy and Daddy's money, second-hand Porsches, an elderly generation of snobs, ridiculous house prices and the automatic assumption that your child will go to Oxford or Cambridge define Ponteland. Yet it is still labeled as a wonderful place to live as is Darras Hall. Maybe it is a wonderful place to live but several decaying schools, the Chav filled Merton Way "shopping center" and a former council housing estate filled with what the prestigious people of Ponteland would call "salt of the earth" residents suggest against this.
In summary; Ponteland has the image of being middle class and civilized, but that couldn't be further from the truth. It is a shithole in its own right, dominated by social pressure, former criminals and the fear of not being accepted by your following middle-class brethren.
There's always someone doing better than you in Pontleland.
JC
"Fancy flying down Ponteland mate?"
"Nor nah, if I wanted to be judged for who I am I could just go to a courtroom"
"Nor nah, if I wanted to be judged for who I am I could just go to a courtroom"
by JACCAJ October 10, 2018
Get the Ponteland mug.Ponteland is a divided village in the north east of England in newcastle . It has 2 parts to it, ‘Darass Hall’ and ‘Pont’. Darass is full of your typical upper middle class snobs who park their massive financed range rovers on the side of the road instead of their 4 mile driveways and shops at the local Waitrose. And then the other average person living their plays for NUFC. However take a walk further up in the village of ponteland to discover the chav infested half referred to as ‘pont’. Pont is a typical housing estate for the lower class families in the village. It is has its own ‘shopping centre’ called Merton way just consists of a one stop, a local chippy and few barber shops. However take a walk down the back ally of Merton way to discover the run-down industrial estate to meet the local plug/ the year7s vape dealers. Pont also has its own high school which many of the pupils don’t like and also its own public park and leisure centre. Be aware though, spend to long in ponteland and it will drive you mad. There is also no escaping it as the local stagecoach bus doesn’t normally arrive for 10 hours!
‘Here ya wanna fly doon ponteland’
‘Nar pal it’s just full of rich cunts and chavs’
‘Nar bro trust hop on the x78 and meet this dealer in the industrial estate for wu 3.5’
‘Nar pal it’s just full of rich cunts and chavs’
‘Nar bro trust hop on the x78 and meet this dealer in the industrial estate for wu 3.5’
by user282881813 January 26, 2024
Get the Ponteland mug.Related Words
Ponteland is a divided village in the north east of England in newcastle . It has 2 parts to it, ‘Darass Hall’ and ‘Pont’. Darass is full of your typical upper middle class snobs who park their massive financed range rovers on the side of the road instead of their 4 mile driveways and shops at the local Waitrose. And then the other average person living their plays for NUFC. However take a walk further up in the village of ponteland to discover the chav infested half referred to as ‘pont’. Pont is a typical housing estate for the lower class families in the village. It is has its own ‘shopping centre’ called Merton way just consists of a one stop, a local chippy and few barber shops. However take a walk down the back ally of Merton way to discover the run-down industrial estate to meet the local plug/ the year7s vape dealers. Pont also has its own high school which many of the pupils don’t like and also its own public park and leisure centre. Be aware though, spend to long in ponteland and it will drive you mad. There is also no escaping it as the local stagecoach bus doesn’t normally arrive for 10 hours!
‘Here ya wanna fly doon ponteland’
‘Nar pal it’s just full of rich cunts and chavs’
‘Nar bro trust hop on the x78 and meet this dealer in the industrial estate for wu 3.5’
‘Nar pal it’s just full of rich cunts and chavs’
‘Nar bro trust hop on the x78 and meet this dealer in the industrial estate for wu 3.5’
by user282881813 January 27, 2024
Get the Ponteland mug.Used in Army Special Forces community as the ficticous name for about 14 or 15 counties of North Carolina.
While going through Special Forces training the final element is a several week long exercise called Robin Sage. It takes place in these counties of N.C. During the exercise you plan and carry out operations as though you're in the imaginary People's Republic of Pineland. The exercise starts with a parachute infiltration of Pineland followed by a series of exercises training "guerillas" operating in the area.
Every once in a while a soldier going through the SF Q course will accidentally interact with a local who doesn't realize their in Pineland. But most of the locals in the community will particiapte in the exercise playing civilians and are aware the Army uses the area they live in for training. A local sherrif once shot a couple soldiers who thought he was part of the exercise after they tried to bribe him with Pineland money.
While going through Special Forces training the final element is a several week long exercise called Robin Sage. It takes place in these counties of N.C. During the exercise you plan and carry out operations as though you're in the imaginary People's Republic of Pineland. The exercise starts with a parachute infiltration of Pineland followed by a series of exercises training "guerillas" operating in the area.
Every once in a while a soldier going through the SF Q course will accidentally interact with a local who doesn't realize their in Pineland. But most of the locals in the community will particiapte in the exercise playing civilians and are aware the Army uses the area they live in for training. A local sherrif once shot a couple soldiers who thought he was part of the exercise after they tried to bribe him with Pineland money.
Soldier 1: how ya doing buddy?
Soldier 2: got my ass through SERE, now its on to the People's Republic of Pineland and I'm done.
Soldier 2: got my ass through SERE, now its on to the People's Republic of Pineland and I'm done.
by infantryscoming August 19, 2010
Get the People's Republic of Pineland mug.Giving a snorkel(sucking ones balls while jerking the cock so it looks like a snorkel)in the shower.
I was taking a shower last night and your girlfriend snuck in to give me a Portland Snorkel and I nutted all over your shampoo bottle, sorry.
by Snorks March 24, 2007
Get the Portland Snorkel mug.The shit hole of the north-western United States.
The sidewalks have the highest piss concentration for a city of its size in the entire world.
The sidewalks have the highest piss concentration for a city of its size in the entire world.
Portland Oregon has a ton of activities for the homeless like throwing needles into the river and pissing in public trashcans
by PDXoriginal March 6, 2019
Get the Portland Oregon mug.A social phenomenon that occurs in the Portland Oregon area. It explains the difficulty of making new friends in the city of Portland, OR, especially being a transplant from outside of the city or state. New residents tend to describe Portlanders as generally polite but not warm and friendly. Very similar to the Seattle Freeze but possibly more perplexing because of the significant number of non-Oregonian/transplants in recent years.
Transplant: Hey, let's meet up sometime!
Portlander: *awkward silence for a few seconds*... Yeah. But I don't think I can, sorry.
Transplant: Hey, you heard of the Portland Freeze?
Portlander: Not really. Most people are transplants anyway. Maybe you're just not social.
Portlander: *awkward silence for a few seconds*... Yeah. But I don't think I can, sorry.
Transplant: Hey, you heard of the Portland Freeze?
Portlander: Not really. Most people are transplants anyway. Maybe you're just not social.
by jollytravels January 14, 2019
Get the Portland Freeze mug.