North American River Chicken 

A white parasitic bird that supposedly originated by the sea but is now more commonly found roosting at McDonald's awaiting a discarded french fry or clamoring with its pals in a Taco Bell dumpster; a 'seagull'.

While widely regarded as harmless, these birds are known to be dangerous and attack unsuspecting fast food chain customers in large groups known as "militias".

Carla: Yeah, lemme get a #4 Biggie-sized, a #2 --fuck!
Drive Thru Boy: ...Ma'am?
Carla: Goddamn North American River Chickens just crapped all over my car!

911 Operator: Sir, what seems to be the problem?
Raould: The fucking North American River Chicken Militia just jumped my ass at the drive thru! Yeah, take the goddamn ketchup packets too you free-loading bastards!

North American River Chicken by Roftlmfaololgtfo February 10, 2010