When your old lady jabs the wound with a phallic object furiously, with such emotional intensity not achieved by another activity.
What did you do last night?

Oh my plans got cancelled so I just whipped out the old mortar and pestle and went to town.
by weeman! September 23, 2009
A marriage of the pittsburgh steamshovel and a skullfuck. Taking a shit in the empty eyesocket of a one-eyed hooker, then squishing your cock into it. Extra points awarded for the famed "Eye to Mouth" move afterwards.
Stump: I got rolled by a one-eyed hooker last night

Nick: How?

Stump: I just finished giving her the Missoula Mortar and Pestle, then she slapped me with a crowbar and took my wallet
by MaximillianBadberg May 26, 2011