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Lomach

A Scottish delicacy, made out of sheep's dick, which is then stuffed with another sheep's dick.
"Aye, Nelson, what's next to the haggis?"

"Ah, that's the Lomach, fresh from the pasture. You'll notice the delicate dick-into-dick stuffing my grandmother has used since the days of old."
by piratemerdi January 24, 2010
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getting loached

spending hours of time getting something super-rare only to trade it in for something of poor/less/unnecessary/stupid value.
getting loached
Hyrule Loach=50 Rupees, 2 Pink Tails=1 Adamant Armor.
by Tejue Omega Daishanto July 28, 2009
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loach

reaching into someone's asshole to steal their shit.
when i went to loach my boyfriend, i found a ring in his ass! then he proposed.

she loached me so hard that i don't think i'll ever need to shit again

hey, are you guys going to the world-renowned music festival loachella?
by X0 Loach 0X June 3, 2008
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toady loach

An unatrative leeching cunt of a woman,a bottom feeding parasite of a person.
Sally ,that toady loach,bummed another 20 bucks off me. Why doesn't she use that gold mine between her legs for something else than a tuna factory?
by ol buzzard March 7, 2014
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locachicky

a very sweet, caring chick who is always thinking of everyone else first. she is goofy and funny, and loves to play around. she goes out of her way to make people happy. but watch it if you do something stupid, cause she can totally kick your ass! Locachicky is beautiful and everyone wants to bang her. she's every guys dream woman and will always be the one that got away.
Freind: are you married yet man?

Guy: No, i missed out on my locachicky. there is no one else.
by anonymousloser June 21, 2008
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loach

A brown object that comes out of your bum. In other words a poo.
Can be used as a verb as well.
I did a loach
I loached it
by loachmonkeyman May 27, 2009
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This is a very serious question and it must be answered carefuly and gradualy.
First, let's see what is the ourpose of Einstein's theory of relativity. Well, it helps an astrophysicist to calculate the trajectory of a galaxy, because at such a large speeds an distances relativistic effects are very important. Than he earns some mony for his calculations, which he uses to buy a car and a flat, so he can get laid. In essence, Einstein's theory's purpose is to get laid.

Geometry of Lobachewsky is about curved space. It is useful for another astrophysicist, to calculate effects of passege of a small black hole next to our solar system, and its effects on our space-time. He will get some mony for his calculations from the agency he works for, so that he can buy a car and a flat, and get laid. In essence, geometry of Lobachewsky is used just to get laid.

And finnaly, let's see what is the burpose of calculus. Well, calculus studies behaviour of systems during some period of time depending on various variables. An engineer employed in hydroelectric power plant uses it to calculet the production of electricity, which depends on the rate of flow of the water through turbines, ammount of water in accumulation etc. It is impossible without calculus. Of course, our engineer won't do this just like that. He will earn money from company he works for, so that he can buy a car and a flat, where he can get laid. In essence, the purpose of calculus is getting laid.

If you want to now more about other scientific disciplines and their purposes contact us at newscientist@harvard.ma.us. But, sincerely, we suppose that you already now the answers.
Student: "What is the purpose of einstein's theory of relativity, lobachewsky geometry and calculus?"
Proffessor: "To get laid!"
by J.Z. - vukajlija April 24, 2009
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