A programming language commonly used as a solution to everything and anything.
Just do it in java!
Fix it... with java!

by Nidht October 12, 2004
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A programming language praised for its versatility and multiplatform support; however, also carrying ridiculous amounts of overhead, using a fuckton of system resources, and generally being a pain in the ass to program in.
Praising Java for fitting on many platforms is like praising anal sex for fitting both sexes.
by Elvarg April 13, 2006
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A programming language despised by many veteran programmers as it allows interns to do 95% of the things they do in half the time and without their pasty complexion, decades of hard graft and countless weekends lost at the Games Workshop.

The veterans wear the forbidden knowledge of pointer arithmetic and varargs as a badge of status and power in much the same way as a fat middle aged shift manager at McDonalds would dangle a large bunch of from a belt clip in the hope of jabbing his pudgy, nicotine stained finger into a confused and vulnerable trainee.
"Garbage collection! That's what Biffa do isn't it?"
by JdeMolay February 24, 2005
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A fully object-oriented programming language. Despised by some, it does not compile to machine code as most languages do, but rather to some "bytecode" that is interpreted by the Java Virtual Machine, which is basically emulation no matter what Sun says. Java programs run relatively slowly, but the syntax is pretty easy, and based on C and C++.
Java is a slow mid-level programming language.
System.out.println ("This is java.");
by M Daniell August 01, 2004
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