Hat Spat 

A chap shap in Carrick where you can get a big feed for fook all, although it used to be cheaper when Maccers was getting his chicken fillet burger out of it every day when we were wee, and his head was so greasy it looked like he'd sprung a leak.

The Hat Spat sells fash suppers, sassij suppers, qwarter pounders, chacken fallat burgers, and pink pasties. Pink pasties are fookin blindin'. The onion rangs are good too, but they'll give you a greasy arse. The chaps are cooked in beef dripping and are the best chaps in the world, full stap.

I'm heading down the Hat Spat. I'm busting for a pasty supper. No, make it a pasty bap supper and givvus another chap, and throw a wee battered sassij on thur too. Im fuckin Hank Marvin.

Hat Spat by Ownies Puppy August 22, 2006