Free Speech Absolutist

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! HAHAHAHAHA!!! AHA! He said this! He said he was that! He banned people immediately! For doing the thing that he is an absolutist about! HA! That’s hilarious! That’s a hilarious thing to do! That’s sounds like something I would do! And I’m evil! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! You hear the Prophet Lord Dr. Professor Jordan Beatrice Peterson (leave be upon him) say that he wants to collude with the government officials he knows personally to create an online facsimile of hell for people who do don’t keep their speech within the confines of his conceptualization of “acceptable discourse”!? I guess the red skull guy was right about him being the type of guy who would collude with the government to silence dissidents, huh? That is wild! That is wild my guy! Look at these sorry sacks of shit!
Elon Musk “I’m a free speech absolutist!”

Elon Musk “And I’m Elon Musk! I gave my child a retarded name because I’m a solipsistic who things I’m living in a simulation created explicitly for me! Nothing I do matters because nothing is real (except me)! I like to fuck people’s wives on a bed of my fathers emeralds! Like that scene from the Pierce Brosnen (Bronson? Bronsen?) James Bond movie where he does that... except with emeralds instead of diamonds!”

Elon Musk “Shit, hey, I’m Elon Musk too! Look at me!”

Elon Musk “Parody” “Hey, I’m following the rules! Oh? I’m banned anyways? Aw, that’s no fun. The freeze peach isn’t very absolute here.”
by Hym Iam November 09, 2022
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Free Speech Absolutist

The correct term is "Speech Absolutist but", usually found in the profile of people who think any opinion they disagree with should be banned and the speaker should be hanged.
I am a Free Speech Absolutist but orange man should be hanged.
by darth leia September 03, 2018
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Free Speech Absolutist

Someone who claims to defend the Freedom of Speech to hell and back, while not understanding how it actually works.

They claim that social media companies taking down TOS violating content is a violation of the right to free speech, but in reality social media companies are private companies, which aren't bound by the First Amendment. This means that they can set up their own boundaries of what is and isn't okay to say on their site.

Despite them complaining how they are being censored online, most of the time they don't actually care about Free Speech, and just want to spread extremist views online without punishment.

There are social media sites that cater to these people (like Twitter), but they usually become Nazi echo chambers filled with toxicity.
What Free Speech Absolutists don't get about social media is that they are private companies and can set boundaries on what is and isn't okay without it being a violation of The First Amendment.
by LPBvgc July 15, 2025
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