When something is totally supery-dupery gay, you can say that it's "as queer as a football bat." Because you don't use a bat in football. See also, tennis helmet.
I'm thinking of switching to FaceBook 'cuz MicePace is getting gayer than a football bat.
A clever, hypothetical weapon used to attack an enemy that's making BS comments using football analogies. See "James Carville Goes Off on Fareed Zakaria" on Youtube.
"Ya he talked about an offensive linebacker.. when I read that I wanted to hit him with a football bat." - James Carville