Geologists are 'scientists' with an unnatural obsession with geology (rocks). Often too intelligent to do monotonous sciences like biology, chemistry, or physics, geologists devote their time to mud-worrying, volcano poking, fault finding, bouldering, dust-collecting, and high-risk colouring. One of the main difficulties in communicating with geologists is their belief that a million years is a short amount of time and their heads are harder than rocks. Consequently, such abstract concepts as "Tuesday Morning" and Lunchtime are completely beyond their comprehension.

Geologists in the movies are nothing like the real thing. For example, in a volcanic eruption, or major earthquake, no geologist is going to give a rat's ass about rescuing a dog even if it does belong to the romantic interest's children. He or she will be far more concerned about the mineralogy of the ash falling from the sky, or the viscosity of the lava flow and its movement across the substrate (which may or may not include a village).

There is a considerable, and still growing body of scientific literature that suggests that geologists are in fact the world's first alcohol-based life form.
The geologists were supplied with alchohol (a common strategy to loosen up the cast in reality TV), but the camera crew was surprised to notice that even after drinking gallons of the liquid, the geologists did not change their behavior, and continued talking in an obscure jargonized language about 'bombs', 'breccia,' and 'lahars,' none of which made for good reality TV.
by AgeTurnipseed October 06, 2009
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Someone who nominally studies rocks, but ACTUALLY studies how pissed, wankered, wasted, rat-arsed, or otherwise drunk they can get, especially when doing fieldwork
Geologists make the bed rock.

Which professor is it who takes a bottle of wine into the field?

Q: How was the geologists party?
A: Wild, everyone was off their faces.
by tw296 November 07, 2007
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A crack smoker; One who smokes rocks. Is often found in an inner city environment.
Urban geologists mugged me for crack money behind the liquor store.
by Stan Smith July 05, 2005
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1.that dan is a complete geologist.
2.thats only a placebo, you may as well call the geologists.
by olly barham October 21, 2007
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aka gold digger, it refers to a woman (or man) who "digs for riches" by entering into romantic relationships with ballers, doctors, and lawyers. Such an individual is more interested in your bank account, bling, status, or cocaine than you.
Girls cum to Harvard to learn how to become financial geologists.
by Muxgasm into your Anoose April 13, 2011
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1. A term for a guy with a small penis that, no matter how long it takes, will completely destroy your hole.

2. Sometimes it's a sex act preformed by men in isolation using a hole in the wall covered by a poster for privacy.
1. I didn't think he could get the job done, but Sarge is a total Geologist Hammer!
2. The guy that used to live in this cell, did the Geologist Hammer behind that poster of Raquel Welch.
by PNWTigerLily November 06, 2018
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