Skip to main content

Geologist 

Geologists are 'scientists' with an unnatural obsession with geology (rocks). Often too intelligent to do monotonous sciences like biology, chemistry, or physics, geologists devote their time to mud-worrying, volcano poking, fault finding, bouldering, dust-collecting, and high-risk colouring. One of the main difficulties in communicating with geologists is their belief that a million years is a short amount of time and their heads are harder than rocks. Consequently, such abstract concepts as "Tuesday Morning" and Lunchtime are completely beyond their comprehension.

Geologists in the movies are nothing like the real thing. For example, in a volcanic eruption, or major earthquake, no geologist is going to give a rat's ass about rescuing a dog even if it does belong to the romantic interest's children. He or she will be far more concerned about the mineralogy of the ash falling from the sky, or the viscosity of the lava flow and its movement across the substrate (which may or may not include a village).

There is a considerable, and still growing body of scientific literature that suggests that geologists are in fact the world's first alcohol-based life form.
The geologists were supplied with alchohol (a common strategy to loosen up the cast in reality TV), but the camera crew was surprised to notice that even after drinking gallons of the liquid, the geologists did not change their behavior, and continued talking in an obscure jargonized language about 'bombs', 'breccia,' and 'lahars,' none of which made for good reality TV.
Geologist by AgeTurnipseed October 6, 2009
Urban Dictionary Merch
Your favorite words on things you can wear, drink from, read, or give to a friend.
The Urban Dictionary Store sells gifts you’ll have to explain.

Prices in USD. Free US shipping. International shipping and regional book fees are shown before payment.

geologist 

Highly educated individuals who eat rocks.
Geologist: Tastes like asbestos.
geologist by Laelaps February 1, 2020

geologist 

Someone who nominally studies rocks, but ACTUALLY studies how pissed, wankered, wasted, rat-arsed, or otherwise drunk they can get, especially when doing fieldwork
Geologists make the bed rock.

Which professor is it who takes a bottle of wine into the field?

Q: How was the geologists party?
A: Wild, everyone was off their faces.
geologist by tw296 November 29, 2007

Geologist 

noun
1. Person who is deeply fascinated by (looking at) rocks/minerals/volcanoes.
2. Person who constantly brings a hammer.
Don't mind him, he's a geologist.
Geologist by MissLittleSiss October 14, 2017

geologist 

1.that dan is a complete geologist.
2.thats only a placebo, you may as well call the geologists.
geologist by olly barham November 7, 2007

geologist hammer 

1. A term for a guy with a small penis that, no matter how long it takes, will completely destroy your hole.

2. Sometimes it's a sex act preformed by men in isolation using a hole in the wall covered by a poster for privacy.
1. I didn't think he could get the job done, but Sarge is a total Geologist Hammer!
2. The guy that used to live in this cell, did the Geologist Hammer behind that poster of Raquel Welch.
geologist hammer by PNWTigerLily November 6, 2018

urban geologist

A crack smoker; One who smokes rocks. Is often found in an inner city environment.
Urban geologists mugged me for crack money behind the liquor store.
urban geologist by Stan Smith July 19, 2005
More from Urban Dictionary
British slang for a scientist or technical expert, esp . when the speaker is not certain of the expert’s specific field of study. Not necessarily derogatory, but typically used by persons without a technical background. In the US, the equivalent would be “egghead”, “squint”, or “geek.”

Origin of the word is unknown. Started sometime in World War 2. Given the typical evolution of British slang, could easily have started because what these experts did was confusing or “baffling” to the common person.
According to the boffins downstairs, the murderer used a serrated blade.
Boffin by Agnon February 11, 2023
Word of the Day on October 3, 2026

Pee Calculus

When you have to pee in a movie but don’t want to miss anything, and must do the following mental equation: will the amount I have to pee cause enough discomfort to diminish my attention capacity for the remainder of the movie to an extent which is greater than the amount of the movie I would miss by making a mad dash to the restroom.
I saw Satantango last night, wonderful film but by the 5th hour I had to start doing pee calculus.
Pee Calculus by anorlondo October 1, 2026
Word of the Day on October 2, 2026
Load more