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Hands-free masturbation device

A girlfriend. When you're getting it on the regular, you don't need to hold your own. Now you can play videogames while bustin' a nut, because you've got both hands free.
Peter: "Dude, who was that hottie I saw you with at the club last night?"

Paul: "Oh, that's Bethany. She's my hands-free masturbation device."

Hands-free masturbation device

Venus 2000 its the next best thing.
Feels so good to be in my Hands-free masturbation device.

Electronic Masturbation Device

An Electronic Masturbation Device, purchased at MEO, is a male jack-off machine that a guy uses or another guy can use to give his dick an awesome cumgasm. A dude's boner is lubed and inserted into it's oriface and placed over his cock-head and then turned on -- with 10 different settings, someone can use the cum-maker to give a guy's cock a mild to wild cumgasm as he blows hs load. Also used for "hands-free" or "forced" cumgasms.
My cadet roomie, Matt, bought an Electronic Masturbation Device, and he ties my hands behind my back and makes me suck his dick until we both have mind and cock-blowing cumgasms -- then he makes me swallow his cum and suck the device clean!
More from Urban Dictionary

proper lad 

a lad that is such a lad that he is a proper lad
person1:did you see bob
person2: ya he was a proper lad
Word of the Day on October 29, 2026
The number of years you are still sexually active
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
sexspan by Dr Kat April 21, 2022
Word of the Day on October 28, 2026
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.
You didn't get any napkins with your takeout pork fried rice? Womp womp.
womp by 175623226 November 3, 2011
Word of the Day on October 27, 2026
When your wife’s boyfriend let you sleep past 8pm 😎😎
Wife’s boyfriend: You have 5 more minutes
Me: Poggers!
Poggers by Just_Charles April 14, 2020
Word of the Day on October 26, 2026

Oblication 

A vacation, feeling more like an obligation, that involves visiting or staying with family.
So Joe where are you taking the kids for spring break vacation? We are going on an oblication to Boca to visit my mother-in-law.
Oblication by kimmerr May 5, 2011
Word of the Day on October 25, 2026

Surf Dracula Syndrome 

A phenomenon in film/television series, most notably streaming series, where the main premise is drawn out to such a point that it takes an entire season or more to get the parts of the series the audience is actually interested in seeing.

For example, if a series is titled "Surf Dracula," a majority of viewers would tune in expecting to see Dracula surfing by the first or second episode. However, the entire first season would instead be tedious padding and backstory before finally ending with Dracula surfing in the last five minutes of the season finale.
I watched "Smallville" on Netflix the other day. Dude, it was ten seasons of filler before he finally flew! Major Surf Dracula Syndrome!
Word of the Day on October 24, 2026
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