Cock wipe

Cock wipe…Tool used for mopping up semen, which would have otherwise been spilled upon your formerly pristine Dungeons and Dragons sheets, to prevent ur mom from putting her hand into ur icky sticky penis goo while doing the laundry.

1)Kenzie: "God ur such a cock wipe!"
Tristin: "Hey! Did u just call me a SOCK?"

2)Mom: "Honey what is all over this sock? It is all stuck together."
George: "Nothing mom....its ummm drool?"
Frank: "Dude ur mom just found ur cock wipe."

by Twat twat June 04, 2007

Cock wipe

The action carried out by IT professionals when pacing around the office, it is often followed up by a 'finger smell'

Andrew "what are you doing?"
Jake "Smelling my fingers after a quick cock wipe"

by Squash Player May 11, 2010

cock wipe

An article of clothing, usually your partners shirt, used to clean up your donger after sex.

I used a cock wipe to clean myself up.

by chupahunter September 24, 2003

cock wipe

Cock wipe. This is what you do if you take a nasty shit but then you realize that there is no toilet paper to be found anywhere in the bathroom. It should be regarded as a last resort, and unlike what is suggested in example 2, an assisted cock wipe is NOT okay.

1) Shit, there isn't any toilet paper left...I better just do a cock wipe.

5 minutes later...shit, i have a tiny dick.

2) Guy 1: DuDe! Do you have any toilet paper in your bathroom?
Guy 2: (coming into the bathroom) Nah man, I got you covered though.
Guy 1: WHOA?!? what are you doing? Are you gay???
Guy 2: No, don't worry, it's just an assisted cock wipe.

3) Guy 1: You don't have any toilet paper in your whole house???
Guy 2: Nope, that's wasteful. I'm eco-friendly.

Guy 3: Huh?
Guy 2: Cock wipes.

by ziiiiiiiiiiiiikaaaaaaaaaaa September 17, 2009