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Asspen

A rare breed of huma who enjoys to be called master itto. If seen proceed with caution.
The Asspen pounded into a gorou bodypillow.
by Fran?! April 7, 2023
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Asspen

an undesirable, selfish male from the famed ski-bum town of Aspen, CO. his main concerns include beer, drugs, and banging you after he causes you to believe he is the answer to your boyfriend prayers. ladies, remember, "the odds are good but the goods are odd."
kate: he was so into me when we were skiing yesterday. i totally thought we connected!
jen: did you bang?
kate: obvi.
jen: girl, he's an asspen! they don't connect!
by mightymississippi September 9, 2010
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Related Words

aspenbergers

A highly offensive portmanteau of the words "Aspen" and "Asperger's"
Dammit Anna, you've spent so much time writing SQL queries that you're saying stupid stuff like "Aspenbergers"!
by MikaFlo2009 April 25, 2022
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Assence

Assence - noun

Any type of odour that contains distinct noticeable characteristics which indicate that the smell originated from the rear end of a person or animal.
The severity of the odour can be of any degree.

"Assence" is formed by merging the words "Ass" and "Essence".

An assence may be the result of: flatulence be it post coital or otherwise, a Rippee, excretion, dogs, pigs or other dirty animals etc....
1: Remember that super hot chick from the dress shop? We had the most amazing date ever last night.
2: And?
1: We get back to her place and had the best sex I have ever had in my entire life, like intergalactic Avatar sex, I blew fireworks all over the wall.
2: And?
1: So afterwards we're lying there, basking in the afterglow when all of a sudden the entire place reeks. It reeks like a sewer in a bad neighbourhood where people only eat Indian food.
2: Now we're talking. Well, there can only be a few possible explanations for this and the first thing that comes to my mind is her vagina. Was it, like, rank dude?.
1: No!
2: That happens to chicks dude, that's why they invented the douche.
1: I thought they invented that so we had something to call you?
2: Very funny…
1: No, I'm just kidding. It wasn't her vagina. I have plenty of experience with rank vagina plus this odour has more of like an Ass Essence to it, an "Assence" if you will.
2: Was it you?
1: No bro, no way, not a chance. First off I never fart with a new chick until like the fourth date, third date maybe. Second off I have never in my life farted the smell of a rotten corpse. I would have to eat the corpse of a dead guy who just ate Indian food and then shit himself in order to fart a smell that bad.

Do you smell that assence?

You can smell an assence if you enter a toilet or restroom after someone had a dump.
Most noticeable in a club/bar or restaurant
by rzhhhh November 23, 2011
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Assenholen

How to say "asshole" while sounding like a stereotypical German.
I'll Fuch you right in ze Assenholen
by Dark Night Enforcer January 27, 2015
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assponent

A measurement representing the degree to which a woman's skirt hem is higher in the back than the front due to her ghetto booty.
Her skirt hem is 3 inches higher in the back than the front! That's a high assponent!
by Rowan Lovecraft July 19, 2006
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Aspen

Most amezing friend you could ever have , they are always supportive and they give the best advice. They are sometimes horny and they are amezing at flirting , they are so special and most people don't even realise it if your friend is called Aspen give them a hug they'll need it
Aspen is my best friend
by 145392 December 22, 2020
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