apatheist 

someone who doesn't care whether or not there is a god or an afterlife

Deists and Theists: Nothing can exist without a cause. Therefore, the universe must have a cause and that cause is God.
Atheists: Does God exist without a cause? If so, you've contradicted your own premise. Your God answers nothing.
Apatheists: Does it really fucking matter?

apatheist by VenkmanMcFly August 25, 2013

apatheist 

Someone who just doesn't care whether God exists or not and realizes that such a fact won't effect their life anyway, comes from the word 'apathy' meaning "absence of emotion" and 'theism' meaning "belief in God"

Susan: "Are you an Atheist? Agnostic? Theist? What???"

Ryan: "None of the above, I really just don't give a shit"

Susan: "So what are you then?"

Ryan: "An apatheist because, like I said, I just don't give a shit and wonder why anyone else does too"

apatheist by sazzymazzy May 1, 2009

Apatheist 

Someone who may not see the value in religious pursuits, may not align themselves with a certain belief structure, or may not concern themselves with religious institutions (including atheism, agnosticism).

Will: I couldn't believe it, this person bought into all that dogma about Noah's Ark and believed in Unicorns and Dragons.

Jim: Who cares? Why does this discussion matter? I'm just an apatheist.

Apatheist by Sweaterman May 22, 2007

Evangelical Apatheist

An evangelical apatheist, one who doesn't care about religious/faith based affiliations, mostly because none provides any real interest or positive feedback, but boastful about his apathetic-ness. He/she is boastful because the fact that he's independent minded and unaffiliated in what he perceives as the general sheep population. Fortunately, this is the best of all the evangelicals, because when he gets his evangelical mojo going, you can't help but laugh. When asked about his religious affiliation, he would reply with either the following or the equivalent "I don't care, neither should you, and here's why...". If praising something, a nearly fool-proof way of identifying an Evangelical Apatheist is if he ends his prayers with "whatever", "meh" or any equivalent.

Every so often, it's hard to determine since they don't really care about schedule either, The INCOEA (Inter-National Council Of Evangelical Apatheists) hosts a gathering of like-minded Apatheists called "the grey gathering" to confront others of similar beliefs and pop bubble wrap to proclaim their indifference towards religion...Oh, and discuss philosophy.

SUPERCHRISTIAN: OMGWTFBBQ that deer is so pretty *Squeals*

Religious congregation: Amen!!!
Evangelical Apatheist: Whatever, dude.
SUPERCHRISTIAN: What's up with him? Do you believe in god?
Evangelical Apatheist: I don't care, neither should you, and here's why. Do you ever see the lilies toil with religion? No, do you see that deer there bother with mosaic law? No, it is natural and it is honest.
SUPERCHRISTIAN: O o
_________________0 - LOLWUT?

Evangelical Apatheist by Heyit'sBrandon May 9, 2011

Evangelical Apatheist

An evangelical apatheist, one who doesn't care about religious/faith based affiliations, mostly because none provides any real interest or positive feedback, but boastful about his apathetic-ness. He/she is boastful because the fact that he's independent minded and unaffiliated in what he perceives as the general sheep population. Fortunately, this is the best of all the evangelicals, because when he gets his evangelical mojo going, you can't help but laugh. When asked about his religious affiliation, he would reply with either the following or the equivalent "I don't care, neither should you, and here's why...". If in prayer, a nearly fool-proof way of identifying an Evangelical Apatheist is if he ends his prayers with "whatever", "So what", "Meh" or any equivalent.

Every so often, The INCOEA (Inter-National Council Of Evangelical Apatheists) hosts a gathering of like-minded Apatheists to confront others and pop bubble wrap...Oh, and discuss philosophy.

Evangelical Christian: The rear of the deer is so beautiful, bless god!
Evangelical Apatheist: So what.
Evangelical Christian: What's your problem?
Evangelical Apatheist: Nothing, I'm an Evangelical Apatheist. You should be too and here's why!

Evangelical Apatheist by ChinaboyD April 26, 2011

internet atheist 

Typically an angry teenager or other power inhibited individual who thinks that all religion across the globe is either Islamic Terrorist or American Christian Fundamentalist and that their arguments are sound because they have watched a Dawkins video online. They take special pleasure in assuming that people with a faith are either deeply offended or will change their life due to anonymous comment based "wisdom".

I wear Internet Atheist t-shirts that try offend old women because I want the world to be free of things that offend me. I am just that devoted. Now go away, I'm playing Skyrim.

internet atheist by Apple iMolestation Device October 30, 2015

Internet Atheist 

Not to be mistaken for an atheist who merely uses the internet, an internet atheist is someone who is ubiquitous when it comes to websites or forum threads related to religion. They will often poke fun at religion and religious people, especially Christians and Muslims, but they have a sort of "search and refute" thing going on with Christians, whereas the Muslims usually only fall prey to internet atheists when they happen to come across them. Of course many internet atheists have the habit of searching for Muslims, too.

They usually lack any sense of humor if jokes are made about them, but they find nothing wrong with being incredibly offensive to the point of being disgusting when making jokes about religious people. They also love to show off their knowledge about any subject they might know something about.

They will often make snobby attempts to annoy or insult religious people, sometimes calling them names, but will immediately condemn someone who bothers atheists, homosexuals or liberals if they don't have a legitimate reason. Even if they do have a legitimate reason that justifies their bothering it might not matter. They will also claim they don't discriminate, but they are usually far more polite and accepting if they think you're a fellow atheist.

Jane the Theist - "God sure has given us a fine day. He did a great job creating the birds."

Internet Atheist - "'God' didn't give as anything; 'God' doesn't exist. And the birds are a product of years of evolution and natural selection."

Red the Atheist - "Christians are morons. They sicken me."

Joanne the Christian - "Ya? Well atheists are jerks."

Red the Atheist - "You're making nonsensical generalizations!"

Internet Atheist by Card Tricks May 27, 2013