Purple Jizz Monkey

A Purple Jizz Monkey is the overly complex drink ordered by the d-bag in front of you at a crowded bar. Often served as a shooter, this drink is characterized by its convoluted and redundant ingredients, and is almost always ordered with 4 or 5 other equally impossible drinks. When the fuck-ram in front of you orders a Purple Jizz Monkey, this invariably delays your drink purchase by several minutes, and the chick you were talking to before you went to get drinks is probably already fucking some townie.

“Thanks a lot, Melvin, you took like 20 minutes to get our drinks and now we’re all sober.”
“Dude in front of me ordered like 5 purple jizz monkeys, my hands were tied.”

by Bill Sampson, Esq. February 21, 2009

tele-spankin' the monkey

Term for when IT or sales staff "work from home" three days per week.

You can't get any fuckin' thing done around here because those support pukes are tele-spankin' the monkey.

by Three Beers April 10, 2009

monkey bite

another name for a big nasty purple hickey. Typically found on or near the neck.

Nice monkey bite dude!! Who'd you go out with last night?

by Dr. RoXX January 19, 2006

Angry Dragon Monkey Tash

Whilst recieving oral sex, the man, uses the hair of the female to pull her to the point of gagging on his penis. At which point, he ejaculates and the lack of air forces the cum through her nose to look like dragon nostrels, the man then takes from a small box next to the bed, his freshly shaved pubic hair and throws it on her cum moustache. A combination of the monkey face and angry dragon....

I gave Emma Henry an Angry Dragon Monkey Tash, and she said thank you!!!

by Willybobo February 18, 2011

Monkey Fingers

A nickname for the roller of a 'joint' made with resin, who has burnt and crumbled the brown resin and left stains on their fingers.

''Hey, Rhys has just rolled that joint, now he's got monkey fingers!''

by MD Geist February 12, 2009

hot monkey sex

Very wild sexual intercourse that may or may not involve the use of monkeys.

After the annual Barn Dance, Joe-Bob and Mary-Joe had hot monkey sex in the stable, waking up all the animals in the process.

by Oprah February 25, 2003

Piss Monkey

piss monkey a name given to mice and rats for their constant peeing pooping and destructiveness

I smell a piss monkey and see his calling card I know hes here tearing up stuff

mouse ,rat ,squirrel ,groundhog ,chipmunk

by littlejimmie December 21, 2015