im really,really,really stoned eg i have been smokin lots of weed and am felling the affects strongly
by jake June 17, 2006
Get the im high as a motherfucker mug.When dealing with a lying-ass motherfucker, the Lying-ass Motherfucker Coefficient (LAMC)is the multiplier (generally around .39) added to any numbers (such as income, number of recent sexual relations, cost of automobile, amount of alcohol consumed, length of prison sentence, etc) quoted by said lying-ass motherfucker, with the intent of approximating a truer estimate of the referenced events.
The actual value of the LAMC fluctuates depending on the relative purity of the lying-ass motherfucker in question and must be adjusted accordingly. A LAMC of .8 or .9 is only appropriate for a "part-time" or a "fly-by-night" lying-ass motherfucker, while a true, pathological lying-ass motherfucker often necessitates a .1 or even a .05!
Use a known quantity to assign a LAMC value to the lying-ass motherfuckers in your life. If, for instance, a lying ass motherfucker at your work claims he made a cool $120 in tips over the course of his shift when you spotted him pocketing a paltry $45, you can safely place his LAMC at .375, give or take a few hundredths.
Once a LAMC is established, it tends to remain fairly constant, varying only in cases of extreme mental excitement, anguish, or upheaval. Lying-ass motherfuckers who are manic drunks, for example, often require a lower LAMC value when they are on the sauce. Tears in the beer, however, can indicate that a higher value should be used ("in vino veritas" rings true, for depressive drunk lying-ass motherfuckers at least).
A final note: the LAMC only applies to numbers which the lying-ass motherfucker has motive to inflate (like the number of people it took to beat the shit out of him last night downtown). For instances where a lower number would seem "cooler" (such as the number of statuatory rape charges on his permanent record) a Reverse Lying-ass Motherfucker Coefficient (RLAMC) must be employed. The RLAMC will be covered in a later article.
The actual value of the LAMC fluctuates depending on the relative purity of the lying-ass motherfucker in question and must be adjusted accordingly. A LAMC of .8 or .9 is only appropriate for a "part-time" or a "fly-by-night" lying-ass motherfucker, while a true, pathological lying-ass motherfucker often necessitates a .1 or even a .05!
Use a known quantity to assign a LAMC value to the lying-ass motherfuckers in your life. If, for instance, a lying ass motherfucker at your work claims he made a cool $120 in tips over the course of his shift when you spotted him pocketing a paltry $45, you can safely place his LAMC at .375, give or take a few hundredths.
Once a LAMC is established, it tends to remain fairly constant, varying only in cases of extreme mental excitement, anguish, or upheaval. Lying-ass motherfuckers who are manic drunks, for example, often require a lower LAMC value when they are on the sauce. Tears in the beer, however, can indicate that a higher value should be used ("in vino veritas" rings true, for depressive drunk lying-ass motherfuckers at least).
A final note: the LAMC only applies to numbers which the lying-ass motherfucker has motive to inflate (like the number of people it took to beat the shit out of him last night downtown). For instances where a lower number would seem "cooler" (such as the number of statuatory rape charges on his permanent record) a Reverse Lying-ass Motherfucker Coefficient (RLAMC) must be employed. The RLAMC will be covered in a later article.
Andrew: Man, Jacob was wasted when I came in last night! He said he drank a whole twelve pack when he was out with Tina!
Joe: Man, fuck that noise. You know that Jacob's Lying-ass Motherfucker Coefficient is a good .25 easy. He drank three beers, cried for a while, got Tina's voicemail, got ten other girls' voicemails, watched TV, and then passed out on the couch, which is where you found him when you came in.
Andrew: You're right, man. Dude's a lying-ass motherfucker. I don't know what I was thinking.
Joe: Man, fuck that noise. You know that Jacob's Lying-ass Motherfucker Coefficient is a good .25 easy. He drank three beers, cried for a while, got Tina's voicemail, got ten other girls' voicemails, watched TV, and then passed out on the couch, which is where you found him when you came in.
Andrew: You're right, man. Dude's a lying-ass motherfucker. I don't know what I was thinking.
by squizzot May 1, 2009
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When you get hurt so bad that the pain is equal to someone fucking your mother, usually used in past tense.
Guy 1:I got hit by a truck and broke my legs and right arm when I was young
Guy 2: Dam, that must have hurt like a motherfucker
Guy 2: Dam, that must have hurt like a motherfucker
by Irregulator July 5, 2011
Get the Hurt like a motherfucker mug.*texting*
Boy: I can't wait to see your vagina pics. It must be so beautiful.
Girl: What? Are you drunk? I certainly don't have any of those pics haha
Boy: *vacation. I mean vacation, not vagina. Damn this motherducker iPhone auto-correct.
Boy: *motherducker
Boy: *motherfucker
Boy: I can't wait to see your vagina pics. It must be so beautiful.
Girl: What? Are you drunk? I certainly don't have any of those pics haha
Boy: *vacation. I mean vacation, not vagina. Damn this motherducker iPhone auto-correct.
Boy: *motherducker
Boy: *motherfucker
by khangster1406 June 9, 2011
Get the motherducker mug.Jasper: Sir, I regret to inform you that the smell of your trousers has attracted the attention of everyone in the room.
Sir Reginald: I see...
*awkward silence as everyone stares*
Sir Reginald: Fuck you motherfuckers.
*leaves*
Sir Reginald: I see...
*awkward silence as everyone stares*
Sir Reginald: Fuck you motherfuckers.
*leaves*
by Speeps April 3, 2011
Get the Fuck You Motherfuckers mug.Is defined as a man that will do anything and everything to get the “End results”. A man that is willing to burn down bridges to light his Motherfucking way. A man that protects what he loves especially his beautiful wife Rayeann Garcia and his three beautiful daughters Anissa Rae, Angelica Rae, Isabel Rae. A man that says we shall finish the game. A man that is relentless to get to his goals and dreams especially his “hearts desires” A man unlike any other man He is everything she never knew she always wanted This Motherfucker is Just a little too much for Rayeann to handle . A man that brings cloud 9 into his reality this motherfucker knows Who he is & what he is. This motherfucker makes movies scenes come to life. This Motherfucker walks up to the edge of the Cliff And jumps in free fall saying “I am going to figure shit out on the way down” This Motherfucker say’s “Girl I am for Real” This was once said to the girl I fell head over heels for while on the phone with her 200 miles away and as her door bell rang she received a bundle of Roses with a card saying “Girl I am for Real”and she is Rayeann Motherfucking Garcia. The one that keeps me grounded when I’m about to fly away. & I love to Fuckin Fly
My Husband is This Motherfucker he just knows what a Real Man needs to do. Steven Garcia you are truly the man I wish I Met first in my life you make me believe I can do anything
by Rayeann’s Motherfucker February 14, 2021
Get the This Motherfucker mug.1) n. When things are not what they seem.
2) When things seem to point towards another dude being a genuine motherfucker but he actually isn't.
Origin: In the film Horrible Bosses with Colin Farrell and Jennifer Aniston, Motherfucker Jones is the murder consultant.
2) When things seem to point towards another dude being a genuine motherfucker but he actually isn't.
Origin: In the film Horrible Bosses with Colin Farrell and Jennifer Aniston, Motherfucker Jones is the murder consultant.
Dude 1: When I was a kid I snuck into my mother's bedroom.
Dude 2: Uh-oh!
Dude 1: She was laying there, naked.
Dude 2: Dude.
Dude 1: She'd been drinking all night.
Dude 2: We get it.
Dude 1: And I snuck up behind her.
Dude 2: Aah!
Dude 1: And I slipped my fingers...into her purse.
Dude 2: Purse. You said purse! Motherfucker Jones !
Dude 2: Uh-oh!
Dude 1: She was laying there, naked.
Dude 2: Dude.
Dude 1: She'd been drinking all night.
Dude 2: We get it.
Dude 1: And I snuck up behind her.
Dude 2: Aah!
Dude 1: And I slipped my fingers...into her purse.
Dude 2: Purse. You said purse! Motherfucker Jones !
by Dean Motherfucker Jones October 5, 2011
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