The ambulance waiting in the wings at sporting events to whisk concussed, paralyzed, and otherwise incapacitated gladiators off to the hospital, which is the first
stop of the rest of their lives of
long,
slow mental and physical deterioration.
"How many meathead wagons were should we schedule for this weekend's football
game?" - Coach #1
"Ah, fifteen oughta do it." - Coach #2
"Hey, great thing the 90% of the
school's extracurricular budget is for the
football program." - Coach #1
"Yeah, no doubt. Just a matter of time before the library and chorus money gets sent our way, too." - Coach #2