Confucius

Confucius was a Chinese teacher and philosopher born 551 BC in Zou. His teachings are obviously influenced by a mixture of tea, heroin, sugar, cocaine, LSD, blueberries, apple juice, methamphetamine, prozac, zoloft, lots of ambien and a pinch of salt. He would normally make this mixture and ingest it about 15 minutes before meditating. When he would come out of his meditative state which usually lasted anywhere from 15 minutes to 126 days he would then write down his sayings. He also made his own paper in a mill he had built in his back yard. He never wrote anything on Saturday or Monday, not for religious reasons but because his wife ran a part time restaurant out of his paper mill building on those two days preventing him from making paper. He wrote the recipes for the restaurant which included several savory cat and dog meat stir fry dishes along with a customer favorite desert made from vultures liver baked into a pie and served with a light glaze made of sugar mixed with warm stomach acid from a North American snailshank whipperfish. Confucius died in 479 BC and was buried in 1976.

Confucius sure wrote alot of interesting sayings but, they can be confusing at times.

by saharadryhumor October 18, 2014

confucked

mixture of fucked and confused. use wisely:

you are one confucked mofo.
or:
wow that chem test really confucked me.

by Nora Sexy Thang January 14, 2004

Confuckinfuzzled

It should be used to describe a situation where you are confused and fucking puzzled!

Did you understand what he was trying to say? Im confuckinfuzzled!

by fludderbi69 May 27, 2010

confuckulations

Giving insincere commendations.

akin to congratufuckinglation

confuckulations grandma you found your teeth.

by antie nae September 27, 2011

confucked

describes the feeling of being to fucking confused.

wow, guys, im too confucked to do anything else.

by iwillbohnyou February 8, 2005

Confuckled

1.A extreem version of being confused.

2.The act or state of being fucked.

3.Totally and utterly confused in a fucked up way.

4. Your in a fucked up situation in which your confused.

To a Friend: Hey what the fuck is this dude?
Friend: *looks at 'other'and see's something beyond confusing and disgusting* Well i'm confuckled.

by Natashia Giesbrecht January 27, 2006

confuckous

A state of chaos, disfunction, and confusion.

(Somebody who causes a Confuckous is know as a confucker or shit disturber)

The fight was a Confuckous! Nobody even knew what was going on.

by Sabre things✌ October 22, 2013