happy morning wake up 

to perform oral sex on your lover while they are sleeping.... they will wake up happy!!!!! (this may be difficult to do if he/she is a heavy sleeper)

Forget breakfast in bed... just wake up to head.... my man gave me a happy morning wake up!!!

happy morning wake up by KatNat March 17, 2009

Good Morning and God Bless 

The act of taking a shit while at the same time eating an egg salad and drinking coffee to sooth your bowels, popularize by H3H3

Mike: "Man, what's takeing Jim do long in the bathroom?"

Jim: "Good morning and God Bless"

Good Morning and God Bless by LargeQuantityOfGay May 22, 2018

morning wood 

the biggest boner you can get. you wake up after sleeping, and your dick is hard as a rock. the best way to get rid of it is to have a sweaty sex session with some fly ruca, she will love it too.

damn baby, i got morning wood. oh well, i guess ill just have to fuck the shit out of you.

morning wood by Anonymous May 7, 2003

good morning camper 

When you wake a girl up with your balls dangling in a teabag over her face. She opens her eyes to the sight (and touch) of your fleshy scrotum and, screaming, tries to swat it away. But like any good Boy Scout, you've come prepared. You've shat in her hands so when she brings them to her face to defend herself, she smears your cocoa butter all across her face. Then, you spray her in the eyes with 'OFF!'. (Use a liberal amount to give off the feeling of a true campout.)

Jon - "Dan, you gotta help me out here. Holly and I are out of variations to spice up our sex life."
Dan - "Why don't you take her camping?"
Jon - "She's not really into the outdoors."
Dan - "You don't have to be outdoors to give a good morning camper, my friend."

good morning camper by Dr. Morrison December 17, 2008

Russian Morning 

Waking up after a night of drinking nothing but Vodka.

The party was fucking insane
Yeah it was good, woke up to a Russian morning though, I felt like shit.

Russian Morning by Iatehisliverwithsomefavabeans September 3, 2013

good the fuck morning 

As "Good Morning" has long since been recognized as little more than a concept, an oxymoron at best; "Good The Fuck Morning", is now the only way to truly wish another a good morning without trying to sound ironic.

SuzieQ: "Good the fuck morning, Ted!"

Ted: "Yeah, no kidding. It is. Imagine that? Well, a good the fuck morning to you too!"

good the fuck morning by jacobkreist March 30, 2007

Triste Morningstar 

Lesbian pirate buttseckz. ZOMGZ!!

y helo thar buttseckz!!1

Triste Morningstar by modista March 13, 2005