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closet doper

a friend who is known to dip off and do shady drugs without ur knowledge.
Yaz is a big closet doper, he does perk 30's on the down low.
by TheWickedest September 30, 2008
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Closet Dj

No Curlystyle, a closet Dj is a person who is just making their own music using music-making programs in the comfort of their own home.

You don't have to be famous Dj in order to be a ''real'' Dj, you just have to either make your own, or remix other trax.
Sick Boy: Did ye hear Dj V4ND4L'S new track?! It's fukkin' superb!

Renton: Ah yeh, I have indeed!

Sick Boy: Do ye think she'll get signed?

Renton: I hope so, but she's a closet Dj, well for now atleast.
by V4ND4L June 9, 2009
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shoe comet

toilet paper stuck to your shoe and trailing out behind you as you leave the bathroom.
As she walked out of the bathroom, Barbara was so inebriated that she didn't notice the shoe comet trailing behind her.
by drdiva August 21, 2009
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Bitch in the Closet

Like when a gay person is in the closet, a bitch in the closet is someone who is a complete bitch and doesn't want to admit it. Even though her mom even tells her.
Christina: I am not a bitch

Mom: christina your a bitch, your just a "Bitch in the Closet", and go to the YMCA your fat.

Christina: Bo?
by La Quanda February 7, 2009
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Out of Closet Experience

An inadvertent gay movement. A gay accident. When a presumably strait individual slips and says or does something really gay.
Strait Dude: Ugh, my wife bought me these pants but they feel a little constricting.

Presumably Strait Dude: Yea, they make your ass look great. I wish my boyfriend would wear those.

Strait Dude: Wait, I thought you were married… to a woman.

Presumably (not any more) Strait Dude: Oops, that slipped. I just had an out of closet experience.
by SimpleKind of Man December 2, 2010
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Halley's Comet

Halley’s Comet (n): a euphemism for the violent projectile formed when a man cumshots a kidney stone. Not to be confused with commonplace occurrences like the ‘cum cork’ or ‘poop noodle’, the Halley’s Comet is a once in a lifetime experience characterized by:

(1) the catastrophic release of pressure necessary to cause a kidney stone to exit the urethra with a minimum muzzle velocity of 500 ft/s (152.4 m/s in CommieSpeak). The terminal ballistics of any given comet is determined by both the mass of the stone and the anger placed into the cumshot.

(2) the signature formation of a white trail of liquid aerosol cum behind the comet which lingers in the air for several minutes, causing it to be dubbed ‘procreative napalm’ by Single Mom’s Magazine.

There are no reported fatalities from direct Halley’s Comet impact (in the 1st world) however they do account for over 1 domestic ER visit a day in the US alone. Halley’s Comets are the leading cause of PTSD in men over 40.
Psychologist: “Tell me about your most recent Halley's Comet ”
Patient: “Just like the other ones, my dick looks like a waffle cone... My neighbors flipped out on me because they thought I intentionally shot their dog with a bb gun, then when I explained that I accidentally killed their dog with my exploded bee-hive looking dick, they just freaked out like I said something ridiculous.”
by Dice E Fleisch March 30, 2015
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Closet case

A closet case is a person who denies their homosexuality. Either because they are young and haven't come to terms with their sexuality. Or they are famous and want to make money marketing themselves to the opposite sex.
There are five closet cases in the band one direction.
by Military milo March 1, 2017
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