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Wilmington, Massachusetts

A safe town based on factual data. A town that offers many affordable youth recreation activities through the town rec department. A town that is not overrun with commercial industry, yet financially benefits from industry on the town borders. Excellent schools. A place that has very poor sports fields for youth athletics compared to surrounding towns that have invested in artificial turf that saves money over time. A town that is fiscally conservative. A town with down to earth, hardworking people.
Wilmington, Massachusetts
High school rated 9 out of 10 on greatschools.net based on 2008 MCAS scores. Youth sports fields look like a dog track. Brand new, state-of-the-art middle school.
by Reasonable1 July 4, 2009
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Mass Porn Storage Device

A laptop used by someone who has little use for a computer other than porn
I need a new Mass Porn Storage Device because windows vista cocked mine up.
by DanSussex December 25, 2007
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Silky Massage

I gave Jennifer the silky massage last night in the movie theater,
by Captain Slappy August 2, 2008
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X-mass

Merry X-mass!!!!
by Lolopurple December 25, 2014
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Solemn Mass

Solemn Mass was the most common before 1962. The Priest would be assisted by a Deacon and Subdeacon. Including a MC, Thurifer, two Acolytes, and some servers to carry torches at the Canon. All parts are sung and chanted. The Subdeacon reads the Epistle, while the Deacon chants the Gospel. The Priest sings the rest of the Mass.
An SSPX Chapel had solemn Mass for the feast of the Assumption.
by Skyrim550 December 15, 2021
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Massachusetts Self-Defense

Locking yourself in the bathroom and asking an intruder to please take what he wants and then leave your house.

Because people in Massachusetts are not allowed to defend their life, liberty, or property. This is based on the liberal notions that if we reason politely with criminals they will surely not harm us, and that defending ourselves lowers us to the level of the criminal. (Since liberals do not believe in levels of humanity, this is difficult to comprehend.)
Oh, goodness gracious, a Pachuco is breaking into our home! Everyone get into the bathroom! We're going to practice Massachusetts self-defense!
by Bumkicker Slade May 14, 2005
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Masscrack

Really, REALLY, REEEEEALY big asscrack. Like... Asscrack so big, it should have its own zip code.
*fat guy walks by*

Guy 1: Dude... Look at that masscrack!

Guy 2: What's it's area code? I'ma prank call it.
by IFindYouFunny June 22, 2010
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