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Is your grandmother Japanese? 

"Oh my God, do you know where you are? Use the handrail on the escalator. Is your grandmother Japanese?"

arse like the japanese flag

a burning and / or stinging sensation in the anus, cause by irritable bowel syndrome, oft the result of eating very spicy food. Also refered to as ringsting, ring of fire, fire-ring.
Bleedin' 'eck! that ruby murry gave us an arse like the japanese flag!

Turning Japanese 

Title of 1980 hit record by The Vapors, with a rhythm said to be suitable for masturbation. Title is a reference to the contorted face typical of a guy about to blow his load after a good tommy. The lyrics apparently tell the story of a guy in jail wanking over a picture of his girl.
1. 'Turning Japanese' by The Vapors made it to number 3 in the UK chart in early 1980.
2. I was having an awesome wank last night and just as I was about to cream myself my fucking roomate burst in and said "Fuck, you're turning Japanese!". How we laughed.
Turning Japanese by jo-ent November 7, 2006

Sino-Japanese Wars 

Sino meaning "China".

There were actually two wars: The First Sino-Japanese War was from 1894 to 1895. The Second Sino-Japanese War overlapped World war II from 1931 to 1945.

The First Sino-Japanese war was between Qing Dynasty China and Meiji Japan over the control of Korea. Because of the newly modernized Japan after the end of the three hundred year Tokugawa (Edo) Period, and the deterioation of the Qing Dynasty and its government, China lost to Japan and recognized the independence of Korea, and the last dynasty of China ended in 1912.

From there, China and Korea were under Japanese control, and so would begin many years of oppression and forced cultural assimilation from the Japanese.

The Second Sino-Japanese War began much later, between the Rupublic of China and the Empire of Japan, and was commonly known in China as "The War of Resistance Against Japan", because by this time, the Chinese were fed up with the Japanese in their country and wanted to rid China of foreign rule because of a rise in nationalism and self determination. The Second Sino-Japanese War was the largest asiatic war of the twentieth century.

Foreign aide, much from the United States, came to help China after Japan bombed Pearl Harbor.

Many plans were suppose to be put to action to secure regions of resistance in China, but after the droppings of the atomic bombs on Hiroshima and Nagasaki, Japan finally surrender.

The Chinese victory of the Second Sino-Japanese War strengthen communist and socialist views, and the People's Republic of China was formed soon after. However, because of years of oppression that were brought upon China and Korea by Japanese imperialist policy, and several war crimes committed by the Japanese Imperial Army (including mass killings, experimentation, starvation, rape and sexual slavery (see comfort women), forced labor, cannibalism, chemical weapons, looting, and torture) many Chinese and Koreans (as well as denizens of countries that were occupied by Japan such as Indonesia, the Phillipines, Thailand, Vietnam, Taiwan, and the Dutch East Indies, etc.) harbor bitter resentments toward the Japanese to this day, and no amount of compensation or apologies will ever cleanse the wounds entirely...
The Sino-Japanese Wars brought about some of the most drastic changes to Far East Asia. Following the wars, many countries became communist, some split, some united, some rose from poverty to become some of the most powerful nations in the world, while others are still developing, and whole lot of them still hate the Japanese
with a passion. What makes a lot of people - many of whom have experienced the horrors of the wars - angry is the fact that many Japanese textbooks refuse to mention any of this important and incriminating history.

Now what do you think about that, you Wapanese morons?

Pseudo-Japanese 

White kids (mostly anime geeks and fat girls) who pretend to know so much about Japanese culture and who pretend to be Japanese. They do so by blurting out random, Japanese-sounding words and naming their made up anime characters with false Japanese names. They scribble random Japanese characters in an incorrect way in their notebooks at school, thinking it means something. These geeks are always bugging people by walking up to them and shouting "DESU DESU DESU!!!" in their faces.

They may fap constantly to hentai, furry porn, or some other crazy Japanese fetish. They also eat lots of California Rolls, Kalamari and Ramen, because those are the only Japanese foods they can think of. They also listen to music ranging from anime soundtracks to bizarre J-Rock.

Sure, it sounds like just a nerd in love with Japanese culture, but when he starts acting like he can speak and write Japanese when he doesn't know jack shit, then he's a Pseudo-Japanese kid.
Guy #1: Look at Freddrick over there, drawing his anime characters again. He named one of them Unochi Michimagi...

Guy #2: Pffftt, that kid is Pseudo-Japanese.

i don't speak japanese 

phrase used after someone says something to you, but you have no idea what the hell he/she is talking about.
person: dude! did you know that mathematicians have discovered that the convergence of a sequence also means that for every epsilon greater than zero, there exists an number "N" such that if "n" is greater than "N" then the absolute value of the limit subtracted by the term is less than epsilon?
you: ....uhhh...
you: **short pause**
you: i don't speak japanese