Hipster Betrayal 

When someone begins to dislike a band, movie, tv show or any other element of popular culture solely based on the fact that it has become popular.

This is something that hipsters do on a regular bases in order to remain relevant. It is the ultimate betrayal because at one point you consider this band or movie to be amazing and now that it has gain recognition instead of being happy you reject it and call it "mainstream".

Hispter: I used to like Arcade Fire but then they became so main stream. I can't even listen to their music any more.

Non-Hipster: Arcade Fire is exactly the same as they used to be, you just doing the Hipster Betrayal.

Hipster Betrayal by Mighty_Arrow February 4, 2013

Hipster kiss 

When two hipsters use telepathy to declare a romantic interest in one another. Words, a peck on the cheek, a reassuring touch, or even a simple smile would betray emotion, thereby running the risk that onlookers might suspect the two hipsters are enjoying the moment truthfully (rather than ironically).

"Lars, do you see how Marius and Clementine are staring coldly at one another from across the room, without speaking or motion of any kind? Do you see how dead her eyes look behind those turquoise spectacles?"

"Yes, Niko, I do. What's their deal?"

"It's a hipster kiss. They'll be engaged as quickly as you can Tweet 'Free art show! BYOB!!' "

Hipster kiss by hipster_of_the_month May 7, 2013

Hipster Welfare 

Living off of monthly donations from Patreon for bad art or 'important work', usually of the social justice variety, which is often subpar or unsellable otherwise. Basically, receiving the financial equivalent of a pity fuck.

"He'd be flipping burgers instead of complaining on his blog if it wasn't for hipster welfare."

Hipster Welfare by PrimalChaos December 22, 2014

hipster ketchup

Sriracha, that's it. Because hipsters put that shit on everything like my two year old does with actual ketchup.

I ordered fries but the chic millennial threw hipster ketchup all over them thinking it was cool and now my IBS is gonna flair up tonight. Damn hipsters.

hipster ketchup by HipsterHater3000 August 3, 2017

hipster woe 

What hipsters feel when something semi-obscure they like (or pretend to like) becomes popular, which they then have to pretend they never liked.

HIPSTER: I liked that song BEFORE it was in that commercial!

DOCTOR: Sounds like a case of hipster woe. Listen to this Os Mutantes album and see me next week.

hipster woe by The Curly-Haired Wonder December 17, 2008

hipster calisthenics 

That time when you have to do lunges, squats, and knee lifts in your skinny jeans to prevent your pants from cutting off circulation to your legs.

"I think the dryer may have shrunk my Dickie's, I'd better do some hipster calisthenics."

hipster calisthenics by phantomg6 March 11, 2013

Hipster math 

Hipster mathematics, sometimes shortened to "hipster math", is a type of mathematics inherent to the lifestyle of hipsters. Hipster math does not follow the rules of the classical mathematics established by trained mathematicians and taught in schools. In this sense, hipster math is a form of "experimental" or "quantum" mathematics.

For example, it is well understood in classical mathematics that if a bank account contains a finite amount of funds, then the combination of having no fixed income with repeatedly withdrawing money from said bank account to finance lattes, flat whites, tighter and tighter jeans, Tom's shoes, outrageous sunglasses, the latest iPhone, ironic cigarettes, and obscure art magazines will eventually produce a zero or even negative balance. However, even hipsters with absolutely no income whatsoever (i.e. hipsters without even a token job at a video rental shop or as a barista) are able to continually and indefinitely finance such frivolities. Another interesting aspect of hipster math is that whenever you think you have counted all the hipsters in an urban park, there are always at least three or four more lurking about that somehow escaped the count, despite the fact that they are strumming guitars and singing loudly and are clearly visible in vibrant hipster uniforms.

"Dude, I think I have seen the same hipster going into that gentrified greasy spoon every night to chow down on a grilled cheese + lobster sandwich, crinkle-cut sweet potato fries, and an ethically-sourced lingonberry milkshake while listening to The Kooks in his Beats headphones and simultaneously scanning Pitchfork and a Henry James novel. He follows it all up with a latte macchiato and four or five Peruvian-chocolate-topped sheeps' butter biscotti. How is he losing weight instead of gaining it?"

"Don't worry about it, man. It's just hipster math."

Hipster math by hipster_of_the_month May 7, 2013