the act of a man laying his testicles in ones eye sockets and laying his dick down the middle of the persons nose to their lips thus resmbling a trojan helmet
by Fudger April 24, 2003
Get the trojan helmet mug.The Trojan War was a war between the Trojan army and a bunch of queers from Greece. The only heterosexual in the entire Greek nation was some spartan dude named Menelaus, who was the mentally handicapped son of the dude from 300. One day, Paris, some dude from Troy, got a bj from this chick named Helen, who was Menelaus' wife. This pissed Menelaus off and he decided to go to war with the Trojans. His brother Agamemnon, who was the leader of most of the other Greek cities (Menelaus was always the slow child) decided to go to war with them.
The Trojans were the greatest, awesomest, strongest, and sexiest civilization of the time, but the Greeks gave it their all. The whole war lasted 10 years. The first 9 years were pretty motherfuckin' boring, but in the last year things got a little screwey. The champion of the Greek army was named Achilles, whose buttbuddy Patroclus got killed by some Trojan dude named Hector. Achilles was pissed off he needed to find another buttbuddy, and decided to challenge Hector to a fight. In the duel, Athena kind of Jewed Hector out of all his weapons, but Hector was still raping Achilles (medaphorically), until Hector slipped on one of Achilles' tubes of anal lube that he had dropped. Hector got a concussion and died. Achilles then tied Hector's dead body to the back of his chariot and rode it around Troy and back to the Greek camps, were he had violent anal sex with it (he liked them messy).
Just before Hector died, the race for the position of King of Troy had began. Priam, who had been president before, lost to the emerging Democratic party lead by Odysseus. This is a little known fact, Odysseus was actually a Trojan dude. After those fucking democrats took over, things got pretty fucked up. Paris shot and killed Achilles with an arrow, and was sentenced to death by Odysseus for the hate crime of murdering a homosexual. His execution was carried out by Philoctetes. Odysseus' next act as President was to tear down the walls of Troy and let all the immigrants come into the city as they felt like it. He built a giant wooden horse as a welcome sign for the new immigrants (similar to the Statue of Liberty). The Greeks used this opportunity to try to invade the Trojan city. However, for some reason the Greeks were all walking with a limp that day (probably because of all the butt sex)and couldn't do shit (heh). The Trojans were able to defeat the massive army of homosexual invaders. However, Odyssues was appalled by his city's mistreatment of queers and immigrants and ordered the destruction of the city of Troy for its xenophobic actions. However, one guy named Aeneas was like fuck that and decided to run to Italy, where he founded Rome. He named it the Roman Republic so his civilization would know to always be republicans and not like those fucking liberals.
Oh yah, and there's a chick who fucked a bull using a machine he friend built for her somewhere in the tale. I don't know where the hell it is.
The Trojans were the greatest, awesomest, strongest, and sexiest civilization of the time, but the Greeks gave it their all. The whole war lasted 10 years. The first 9 years were pretty motherfuckin' boring, but in the last year things got a little screwey. The champion of the Greek army was named Achilles, whose buttbuddy Patroclus got killed by some Trojan dude named Hector. Achilles was pissed off he needed to find another buttbuddy, and decided to challenge Hector to a fight. In the duel, Athena kind of Jewed Hector out of all his weapons, but Hector was still raping Achilles (medaphorically), until Hector slipped on one of Achilles' tubes of anal lube that he had dropped. Hector got a concussion and died. Achilles then tied Hector's dead body to the back of his chariot and rode it around Troy and back to the Greek camps, were he had violent anal sex with it (he liked them messy).
Just before Hector died, the race for the position of King of Troy had began. Priam, who had been president before, lost to the emerging Democratic party lead by Odysseus. This is a little known fact, Odysseus was actually a Trojan dude. After those fucking democrats took over, things got pretty fucked up. Paris shot and killed Achilles with an arrow, and was sentenced to death by Odysseus for the hate crime of murdering a homosexual. His execution was carried out by Philoctetes. Odysseus' next act as President was to tear down the walls of Troy and let all the immigrants come into the city as they felt like it. He built a giant wooden horse as a welcome sign for the new immigrants (similar to the Statue of Liberty). The Greeks used this opportunity to try to invade the Trojan city. However, for some reason the Greeks were all walking with a limp that day (probably because of all the butt sex)and couldn't do shit (heh). The Trojans were able to defeat the massive army of homosexual invaders. However, Odyssues was appalled by his city's mistreatment of queers and immigrants and ordered the destruction of the city of Troy for its xenophobic actions. However, one guy named Aeneas was like fuck that and decided to run to Italy, where he founded Rome. He named it the Roman Republic so his civilization would know to always be republicans and not like those fucking liberals.
Oh yah, and there's a chick who fucked a bull using a machine he friend built for her somewhere in the tale. I don't know where the hell it is.
The Iliad and the Odyssey were the two gayest books I ever read, why the fuck do they make you read them in school?
If the Greeks won, why the fuck is it called the "Trojan War"? WTF
If the Greeks won, why the fuck is it called the "Trojan War"? WTF
by Konages June 8, 2009
Get the Trojan War mug.Related Words
Trojan
• Trojan Horse
• trojan whore
• Trajan
• Trojan Man
• trojan war helmet
• tejana
• trojan helmet
• Tejano
• Thejan
This is, quite simply, when you insert a lubed, unrolled condom into someones ass with your finger, blow it up like a balloon inside their ass, tie it off, and then whip it out of their asshole as hard as you can.
by lcableguy9002 November 5, 2009
Get the Trojan Donut mug.The greatest person you'll ever meet.
Innocent and sweet cinnamon roll that is shy but capable of taking anyone out if threatened
Loves to Roleplay and possibly Yandere
Loyal friend till the end -someone you can always count on.
Sexually satisfying when given the chance! Perfect human being in all forms of the word.
Known to have amazing voices to make even the Gods Swoon.
Innocent and sweet cinnamon roll that is shy but capable of taking anyone out if threatened
Loves to Roleplay and possibly Yandere
Loyal friend till the end -someone you can always count on.
Sexually satisfying when given the chance! Perfect human being in all forms of the word.
Known to have amazing voices to make even the Gods Swoon.
by AceJinxEcho December 19, 2016
Get the Trevante mug.a position in which a man positions his balls over the girls eyes and his penis along her nose to resemble a trojan war helmet
by BMW March 30, 2003
Get the trojan war helmet mug.The newest condom technology - feels like "Nothings there!" closely meaning that it was created as an excuse for unprotected sex; thus feeling better than a regular one and in exchange resulting in a large number of broken condoms, unwanted pregnancy's, and STD's.
by asdgdfgh July 28, 2009
Get the Trojan Ecstasy mug.A Trojan Mongorian Horse is a deceptive weapon inspired by the infamous Trojan Horse that the Greek's used to trick Troy during the Trojan War. The difference being that no one is inside of a Trojan Mongorian Horse, because it is filled with Sweet and Sour Pork, a substance known to be hot and sticky and the main weakness of Tuong Lu Kim (aside from being Asian, having English as a second language, and being subject to the worst possible speech impediment that could result from those two qualities), owner and manager of the City Wok in South Park, Colorado.
"Oh I get it, a Trojan Mongorian Horse. Mongorians are hiding inside, tinking that I bring it in da' shitty wall, d'en Mongorians pop out and destroy shitty wall from da' inside out without gettin' da' sweet and souwa pork on day head. Okay, I'll pray arong" - Tuong Lu Kim
by DriftEJ20 April 26, 2011
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