Fake Patty's Day

Once upon a time there was a holiday called St. Patrick's Day that everyone wanted to celebrate by drinking green beer and singing that song that says, "Oh baby you...got what I neeed!" It was a lot of fun until the government and college officials got together in a conspiracy to strip college students at KState of any possible fun they might have. They decided to make Spring Break happen at the same time as St. Patrick's Day, thus condensing two fun times into one and student's were like "nooo! not fair!" So they got together with the Aggieville peeps and said, "lets make our own FAKE holiday that will be tight so we can have two fun times again!" Then they made Fake Patty's Day and everyone bought shirts to wear from THREAD Hot and Fresh T-Shirts made to order! Now it's like the biggest holiday in the world and people come from Russia and Australia just to take part in the ritualistic beer drinking and dance-offs with officials trying to stop Fake Patty's from happening.

The end.

Ps. Popular mythology claims that on the day of Fake Patty's Day, every rainbow in the world ends in Manhattan Kansas.

I know, I got a Fake Patty's Day from that t-shirt place, and then I threw up in it!

by _______funfunfunfun_________ January 20, 2011

valentine's day

Probably the lamest holiday known to man. Just a ridiculous waste of time. I would celebrate groundhog's day way before this lame ass day. It is for wimpy puppy dog types that are about to get their lives ruined by an evil snatch.

I wish the women would shut up about valentine's day and get their asses back to work.

by running out of patience February 14, 2008

valentine's day

1. an evil "holiday" that is a big crock.

2. a day where people who are single and hating it and recently divorced people are depressed becausing of the glamourization of "love".

3. also known as single's awareness day.

Retailers are excited about Valentine's Day because it will generate more profit.

I'm going to be so depressed on Valentine's Day.

For Valentine's Day me and my single friends are going to go out, try to have fun, and get drunk.

by Marcy January 29, 2004

Valentine's Day

1: A marketing ploy designed to create the expectation between couples that they will buy useless, overpriced "gifts" for one another that will be quickly forgotten the day afterward.
2: A cruel, vicious holiday designed to mock single people and remind them of just how lonely they are.

1: My girlfriend got pissed 'cuz I didn't get her some shit for Valentine's Day.
2: Valentines Day makes me want to crawl in a hole and die.

by Gazuga April 22, 2004

Postman's Day

A day in which the weather continually switches back and forth from sunny to rainy. A joke on the phrase 'Rain or shine' that was originally used by postmen. Also known as a postman's situation.

'This weather is crazy. It's sunny but it keeps raining on and off. It's a postman's day.'

by Dark_Midget April 13, 2007

valentine's day

Commercialistic bullshit holiday invented by corporations to cash in on pussy-whipped men. Tries to create the image of love and when the day is really about money, greed and materialistic objects. It also makes single people feel miserable. Suicide rates are known to go up during this time of year.

"Hallmark and Fannie May all cash in on Valentines Day while making single people feel miserable in the process."

by DJHill February 14, 2004

Valenswine's Day

The day before Valentine's Day, that guys use to spend time with the second (or third) most important women in their lives.

February 13th is the day that mistresses get to feel like wives and sideline hoes get to feel like star players.

It's especially sad when the girl doesn't know she's not the only girl her "boyfriend" is seeing.

Girl 1: He's taking you out the day before Valentine's Day?

Girl 2: Yeah, he has to work late on Valentine's Day.

Girl 1: I'm pretty sure he's going to be with his actual girlfriend. That's why he's taking you out on Valenswine's Day.

by TaylorHoward January 27, 2011