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closed goat

Oooooh, you don't have camel-toe, so you must have a closed goat.
by erectism January 11, 2008
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Closet Douche

That one person who has the uncanny ability to partake in douchery but does not exibit all the qualities of a typical douche, leading some people into the illusion that this person is not in fact a douche. In many cases a closet douche is only a douche to guys so oblivious girls think hes a cool guy, adding to the hatred of him. Also, creatine is used by certain closet douches to artificially bulk them up, but everyone knows it just shrinks their ballsack.
guy: "God damn Bob is such a douche"
oblivious girl: "No he's not, he's really a nice guy and he's so muscular."
guy: "No he definatly is, it's just he's just a huge closet douche."
by DD6969 January 19, 2010
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Closed Friendship

that uncomfortable place in a developing relationship where it would be awkward for either person to see other people but the two are not yet a couple
Girl, get off that, you're in a closed friendship with him; stop banging his bestie.
by fuckwanandesuka September 25, 2010
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Closedverse

A failed Miiverse clone website that shut down many times, finally coming to an end in 2021. Many equally lowbrow clones popped in its place, yet none of them have reached the same notoriety or even lasted as long.

The site consisted of mainly children or manchildren, 10% of which were admins, often banning or deleting whatever they wanted on a whim.

The main community, the general community, would always have drama almost every single day, usually a user feigning depression, being a meanie weenie to someone, or sometimes something serious like pedophilia accusations (most of which were unfounded or a knee jerk reaction to something minor.)

Also Stoney is the best user on there and this totally isn't him writing this after living his best life and getting a wife and possibly a kid soon ;3
"I'm going on Closedverse"
"Be careful, man, Gnarly might infect you with his virgin status"
"Relax, man, it's Closedverse not Cedar."
by Opa Opa February 23, 2023
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relationship closet

When two people are more than friends but the do not want anyone to know.
My best friend and her boyfriend have been an item for a year. They need to come out of the relationship closet and and admit they are in love.
by laura46 December 9, 2010
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locked in the closet

The inability to come out gay because of the possibility of brutal retaliation from others. This could include being targeted by anti-gay groups, being avoided by your friends, etc.
Daniel wanted to come out, but because he lived near the Westboro Baptist Church, he was basically locked in the closet.
by MexiGin May 14, 2012
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I'm willing to get closer if you are

when a girl has absoultely no idea how to respond to your confession so will instantly default to "i'm willing to get closer if you are"
I'm honestly truly flattered, your the nicest guy i've ever known but i'm willing to get closer if you are
by doggiestar314 March 14, 2021
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