if you're reading this

an unusually fancy way of saying "there are good news and bad news", except its mostly manipulated into thinking its bad

Hello, if you're reading this, it's too late. I have eaten half of the cake you wanted to give to your friend Ronald because it was red velvet. You can't make me puke it out this time. Sincerely, James

by finally i found a name February 17, 2025

Beach Read

A classic Beach Read is a novel deeply rooted in the beach house/town. The setting is almost a character in the book. Usually, someone is at a crossroads in their life and they find a new path forward through their time at the beach.

A good Beach Read sets a pace of summer at the beach - it has twists and turns, axillary characters woven throughout, parallel plot devices, and often a love story in the mix too.

My Beach Read is making me miss my time at the beach this winter.

by KingBratwurst March 13, 2022

I aint reading allat

An excuse a toddler uses as an excuse for the fact that they are unable to read

Person 1: (types 3 sentences in response to an argument with person 2)
Person 2: goo goo ga ga mf bitch I aint reading allat 🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️

by HauntedMalk January 29, 2024

Dump read

The act of reading a magazine article while taking a dump.

People magazine, Maxim, porn and the daily paper are good dump reads.

by Evilbadkitty June 15, 2013

reading the same book

When two or more people are on the same page about something or talking about the same thing

“Are we reading the same book”

by bananajoe August 23, 2020

Read Bassler

A super omega cutie. He does really gay things in sports like volleyball that annoy the hell outta you, but a real good player nevertheless. His mom has an omega-gyatt, but he never admits it. Also likes to go to the gym, and play basketball cuz he’s a basketball tryhard. Also hums really loudly in the back of class, not knowing it.

“You see that guy over there? He’s a real Read Bassler.”

by BrennanNotDeaver December 21, 2023

Reading Coperehension Effect

when someone claims you don't understand the writing of a particular story or character instead of just admitting their character written like shit

Notable benefactors of the Reading Coperehension Effect are Jinrang from Lookism and Yuno from Black Clover

by theknownallbeall August 9, 2025