dehydrated cactus

When you haven't gotten laid in a long ass time because you're a prick.

Look over there that dudebro is a dehydrated cactus.

by DickSlaya69 March 4, 2016

pokey cactus

The act of a man covering his penis in glue, getting sand all over it, and having anal sex with his partner.

Since we're on the beach with a bottle of glue, how about I give you a pokey cactus?

by Bshshdbs March 10, 2016

cheese cactus

A spiky/leafy bud of cannabis

That cheese cactus off that dealer way shy

by Cheese cactus April 21, 2016

Dusty Cactus

Any hole or object used to have intercourse (or masturbate with) that is very dry. Feels as though your penis is being harassed by a cactus. Often leads to chaffing and inevitable pain with possible blood loss.

That was one hell of a night, but her asshole is a dusty cactus.

She said to stick it in, so I did. We didn't have any lube for that Dusty Cactus. Owey

My cock is so raw that it's bleeding. Damn Dusty Cactus. I'm never doing anal again.

by ObviousDailyLingo May 8, 2016

lady cactus

Prickly Puss

Have you ever scratched your lady cactus and gotten caught?

by LeiM0 June 6, 2016

Family Cactus

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Gurl: Family Cactus?
Boi: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

by Family Cactus666 February 27, 2017

Portuguese Cactus

The act of sitting your vagina slowly onto a cactus and then pouring lemon juice into the open wounds

My favourite torture method it the Portuguese cactus

by YellowNiqqa March 4, 2017