The fap-bastard

"The lonely suburban" to masterbate while pooping or just sitting on the toilet.

Dude I ate some bad food yesterday so I had plenty of time on the toilet for the fap-bastard

by Johnny coxvile August 20, 2017

Fanta fapping

The art of dismembering ones hand and using it to masturbate

Ian "rick, have you ever tried fanta fapping "?
Rick "no whats that"?

Ian" look it up on urban dictionary"

by Jumont 357 October 19, 2016

fap gap

When an unusual amount of time lapses between normally frequent faps.

I was on it pretty regularly for a while, but I've had a pretty big fap gap the last 4 or 5 days. I need to get back to my regular schedule and get back to fulfilling my fap cap daily.

by Annoying Little Dad April 24, 2023

spite-fap

Fapping to someone you find morally reprehensible, like Adolph Hitler fapping to Sarah Silverman.

I only watch Fox News to spite-fap to Megyn Kelly.

by Walter Duckface September 12, 2015

Acoustic Fap

When there's a power outage, but you printed out a bunch of nudes that you keep in a binder under your desk.

See also: Jerk-off unplugged

During Hurricane Sandy, I had a number of acoustic faps.

by Maxil April 4, 2017

Cyber Fap

The act of fapping while chatting via web cam

Dude : Yo bro did you cyber fap with my girl last night?

Bro: Yeah dude, I cyber fapped with her all night.

by Joe mother May 10, 2015

Fap Bastard

A person who was unintentionally conceived through masturbatory semen.

Fuck off Mike. Your mother sat on a pile of cum on a toilet seat at a barn party back in '92 which consequently produced you. You're just a filthy fap bastard.

by JamieB123 November 1, 2014