Like the great Shaolin Monks of the majestic Tibetan Monasteries, fap aficionados must go through incredible amounts of training and meditation to achieve seminal enlightenment.
Now, there are two key words that all fap aficionados must know: speed and endurance.
The average joe will often finish masturbating in 9-15 minutes, as studies show. However, a fap aficionado will be able to blow these times out of the water with a staggering 45 seconds-2 minutes (and that takes dedication!).
To be able to go so hard, the fap aficionado must learn how to endure the pain and sheer intensity of the “2-minute quickie”, as this is a very hard thing to do. One must exercise their hand muscles to the point of being able to crush an unripe walnut with one singular hand.
But this is not all, young child, the fap aficionado must also know how to do the fap and piss maneuver. This specific technique takes ages to master, and can cause the “doer” of the task extreme pain, or even nut shut.
With these skills and traits combined, anyone who has a penis can master their shaft and become one of the greats.
Now, there are two key words that all fap aficionados must know: speed and endurance.
The average joe will often finish masturbating in 9-15 minutes, as studies show. However, a fap aficionado will be able to blow these times out of the water with a staggering 45 seconds-2 minutes (and that takes dedication!).
To be able to go so hard, the fap aficionado must learn how to endure the pain and sheer intensity of the “2-minute quickie”, as this is a very hard thing to do. One must exercise their hand muscles to the point of being able to crush an unripe walnut with one singular hand.
But this is not all, young child, the fap aficionado must also know how to do the fap and piss maneuver. This specific technique takes ages to master, and can cause the “doer” of the task extreme pain, or even nut shut.
With these skills and traits combined, anyone who has a penis can master their shaft and become one of the greats.
Marv: Bro, you’ll never get done in time, the teacher’s gonna ask where you are!
Billy: Relax Marvin, I’m a fap aficionado, I can handle this.
Billy: Relax Marvin, I’m a fap aficionado, I can handle this.
by THE_00F_MAN November 18, 2019
Get the Fap Aficionadomug. "Go have a batty fap you battyfapper."
"Quit your battyfapping!" - Stop being an arse wanker.
The term Battyfapper may be used to describe the profession of male and female strippers, who parade their batty for the fapping pleasure of their audience.
"Quit your battyfapping!" - Stop being an arse wanker.
The term Battyfapper may be used to describe the profession of male and female strippers, who parade their batty for the fapping pleasure of their audience.
by MintJollyBoy January 6, 2012
Get the Batty fapmug. by Walter Duckface September 12, 2015
Get the spite-fapmug. An allegory for a terrible porn addiction.
At any given point you are either fapping or not fapping, like your the cat and fapping is the poison.
At any given point you are either fapping or not fapping, like your the cat and fapping is the poison.
Paul: "Dude, I can't stop thinking about titties, it feels like at any time im liable to breakdown and masterbate"
Patrick: "well it sounds like your going thru a case of Schrodinger's Fap"
Patrick: "well it sounds like your going thru a case of Schrodinger's Fap"
by Founder of Shrodinger's Fap April 29, 2022
Get the Schrodinger's Fapmug. When an individual does not settle for just the simple
type of porn; but many. When someone goes far
and wide around the internet fapping to a variety of
types of porn/pornsites. This could go hentai to realistic porn,
furry porn to Mia khalifa, basically, exploring whilst
fapping!
Endings: Fap explorer, Fap explore, Fap exploration
type of porn; but many. When someone goes far
and wide around the internet fapping to a variety of
types of porn/pornsites. This could go hentai to realistic porn,
furry porn to Mia khalifa, basically, exploring whilst
fapping!
Endings: Fap explorer, Fap explore, Fap exploration
by The Fap Explorer September 15, 2016
Get the Fap Exploringmug. Did you hear about Tommy Wommy Womsters? He tried to do a pogo fap and he wiped out and broke several bones. Now the poor guy can't even cuff his carrot.
by Annoying Little Dad April 24, 2023
Get the pogo fapmug. Ian "rick, have you ever tried fanta fapping "?
Rick "no whats that"?
Ian" look it up on urban dictionary"
Rick "no whats that"?
Ian" look it up on urban dictionary"
by Jumont 357 October 19, 2016
Get the Fanta fappingmug.