A sneaky Hastert involves performing an unwelcome sexual act, under the pretense of performing some other helpful action. The name comes from former house speaker Dennis Hastert, who allegedly molested members of a wrestling team he coached, under the pretense of assisting with the treatment of sport related injuries.
Person A: My groin cramped up in wrestling practice again, and the coach offered to help me stretch it out.
Person B: Oh, that was helpful.
Person A: It would have been, but while I was writing in pain, he jacked me off and fingered my asshole, then ran away while laughing maniacally and sniffing his fingers.
Person B: Ah, the old sneaky Hastert.
Person A: Yeah, I feel so violated.
Person B: Oh, that was helpful.
Person A: It would have been, but while I was writing in pain, he jacked me off and fingered my asshole, then ran away while laughing maniacally and sniffing his fingers.
Person B: Ah, the old sneaky Hastert.
Person A: Yeah, I feel so violated.
by butlerj June 15, 2016
Get the sneaky hastert mug.To cause one to not be able to move, walk, or function. To immobilize someone, to make someone powerless. (taken from the literal practice of cutting with a knife an animal's or person's hamstring muscle) past tense - hamstrung
The lack of investors will hamstring my efforts to move the project forward.
I was hamstrung by the flu prior to the marathon.
I was hamstrung by the flu prior to the marathon.
by irzapper August 18, 2007
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by Emily6363 April 28, 2006
Get the hamsterous mug.When a person or company tries to get out of a situation, by finding a loophole to get through, or coming up with some kind of bullshit excuse.
Much like a hamster tries anything to escape its cage.
Much like a hamster tries anything to escape its cage.
Damn insurance company is hamstering out of paying me.
by somegirlyoudontknow February 29, 2008
Get the Hamstering mug.Most likely the world's most horrible burn or insult, and can only be countered with "Your Father Smelled of Elderberries!"
by The Silent Assassin August 15, 2006
Get the Your Mother Was a Hampster! mug.(In HBO's The Wire) The area where all drug trafficking was pushed, by police, to clear up the rest of Baltimore's corners. It was an area filled with vacants.
by molson622 April 28, 2007
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Adj. Derivation of Pacific Northwest American slang, early 21st century.
To have an ass which smells and looks like that of a hamster's.
By implication the person uses cheap toilet paper, is poor, and unwashed. The further implication is the person eats over processed food with little to no nutrition; therefore, their posterior is unshapely and the body can be likened to a pear, or hamster's figure.
Adj. Derivation of Pacific Northwest American slang, early 21st century.
To have an ass which smells and looks like that of a hamster's.
By implication the person uses cheap toilet paper, is poor, and unwashed. The further implication is the person eats over processed food with little to no nutrition; therefore, their posterior is unshapely and the body can be likened to a pear, or hamster's figure.
"Have you seen the hamsterass on that trailer park bitch?"
"Jesus Christ! look at the hamsterass on the Wal-Mart greeter."
"Jesus Christ! look at the hamsterass on the Wal-Mart greeter."
by Johnathon Mill November 1, 2009
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