Choking the Goat

To masturbate, to beat the meat, to jack off.

Person 1: Why was your door locked for 3 minutes this afternoon?

Person 2: You know how it is. Just choking the goat and shit.

by NaderI May 5, 2011

giddy goat

Someone who has made a small but silly mistake. Often used as the word nincompoop would be if it were directed towards yourself.

“I left the washing outside in the rain, oh I am a giddy goat!”

by Mr.GiddyGoat December 17, 2017

The Rule of Goats

The Rule of Goats says that self-awareness or irony doesn't change public perception. If you fuck a goat, even if you say it's for the lulz or to prove a larger point, you're still a goat-fucker.

The saying was coined by criminal defense attorney Ken White of the Popehat Report. It's loosely connected to an Irish Pub joke about an old man who has multiple accomplishments but also once fucked a goat. In the end, nobody recognizes him for his achievements and instead only knows him as the goat-fucker.

Defendant: "I was only trolling when I said all those awful things."
Ken White: "The Rule of Goats applies."

by NoneCanHandle November 7, 2021

goat bags

a females breasts: also known as flops

holy shit have you seen DANIELLES goat bags? they are fuckin HUGE!

by SiCkWiTeMs January 30, 2008

city goat

The urban equivalent of a hillbilly.

Have you seen all those old truck parts outside the Hatfield place? He is such a city goat!

by tomdog Klisuric December 26, 2008

goat spray

A perfume or body spray used to ensure that one doesn't smell like a goat. Sometimes used in conjunction with amonkey bath when one is short on time.

Also, a spray that has been used specifically to cover up and/or mask the smell of body odor, cigarette smoke, or any other foul odors.

Katie: "Are you going to take a shower before we go out?"
Sheri: "Nah, a monkey bath and some goat spray should do it."

by Resident Drunk January 8, 2008

Mountain-goating

The act of scaling rocks and hillsides at a rapid pace.

Billy was mountain-goating up the rockside in order to capture the flag.

by thecumdown September 5, 2012