ham fountain

Sit backwards on a woman's face while you jerk off on her tits.

She was blown away when I showed her my amazing ham fountain!

by anonymous June 12, 2016

Vote Ham

More than merely a slogan, more a state of mind.

You want a meaning to your life? You want a reason for being? Vote Ham and realise your existence.

To find what you seek in the road of life,

the best proverb of all is that which says:
"Vote Ham."

by Bruno2010 January 14, 2010

Ham-Slamwich

Vigorous anal sex.

Rachel bent over in her bathrobe and the next thing ya know boom, ham-slamwich.

by Eaton Holgoode December 10, 2018

ham night

It's that thing where you throw a party, but you live in America - so all your guests are overweight and your air conditioning isn't keeping up as everyone is basted in their own juices.

Things really turned for the worst when someone brought up politics at our Ham Night.

by DarkDiggler June 3, 2020

Ham Master

The man or woman with extreme skills cooking a piggy. Legendary bacon skills indeed. A pineapple ham extremist of sorts. Ham Masters are very valuable to social functions.

Yo Jeev, I am planning a barbecue of epic proportions, is there any chance you could get us a ham master? I am looking to impress!

by pooter diddler May 9, 2015

Plate of Ham

Cockney Rhyming Slang for Gam, a now defunct term to mean oral sex, specifically that performed on a willy (blowjob).

"Fancy a plate of ham?"
"No thanks, I don't eat meat."

by peckhamboi January 15, 2009

The Ham is on the Table!

1. A metaphorical statement implying a complete loss of tolerance for a given situation.

2. A statement confirming the beginning or end of any course of action regarding a given situation. (i.e. "It's on now" or "The shit has hit the fan"

I'm tired of that fool talkin all that shit about me...The ham is on the table!

by Noeliam83 October 4, 2009