John Michael

The sweetest boyfriends, you couldn’t ask for a better man. Huge dick’s where it counts, looks like jake gyllenhaal but teaches yoga.

You’re boyfriend is so hot, he’s such a John Michael.

by KyDandi April 2, 2022

Long John

The cutest ferret in the world

“Long John stop biting my toes!” “Where’s Long John? Oh he’s in the drawers”

by sxccubxs June 25, 2018

Melted John

Someone who is extremely intoxicated (a Glaswegian slang term)

Oaft I’m absolutely melted John

by danie7smith March 6, 2025

John

Good person

Defined john is a calm and Campos and trust everyone easily

by anonymous November 24, 2021

John gonzales

Short for Buford Samuel Humpindinkle or a little boy who’s milkshake brings all the boys to the yard

She has a John gonzales milkshake

by Papi chulo * November 26, 2019

John Marquina

A person to laugh at any time with his noises and singing and his highly charming face

Oh Wow! You are such a John Marquina

by Urban Dictionary May 1, 2018

John

John is a short person, and quite chubby. He is also one of those fuck-boys with a raspy-ass voice and thinks he's all that! He's arrogant and laughs at the worst jokes. His hair is probably taller than he is and his hairstyle is very old. If you see a John, run, run like the wind..

Jayson: WHO is that kid?
Garrett: Oh- that's John.
Jayson: Yo- his hair is out of date, smh

by A Kylie December 2, 2019