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West Leyden top hat 

When you defecate in a person's hat and leave it on their porch to discover.
Give him/her a West Leyden top hat tonight
West Leyden top hat by todd_jason December 5, 2019

three fingered cotton top hat 

The sexual act of inserting the three middle fingers into a vagina (or anus), through the underwear.
Mike's horny girlfriend asked him for a three fingered cotton top hat.

Alabama Top Hat 

When a woman sits on her partner and queefs in their face
I can't believe I gave Adam West an Alabama Top Hat!

Turtle Top Hat

When a man takes home a woman who chose to wear a top hat out to a formal event. Right after she falls asleep, he ejaculates around the rim of the hat, then puts it back onto her head. When she wakes up and her hair has fused to the hat and protests, he simply pulls the hat down forcefully causing her head to pop out of the top of the hat, much like a turtle peeking his head out of his shell.
The bed didn't have any sheets so I couldn't Superman that hoe, but luckily I was able to still Turtle Top Hat her shit.
Turtle Top Hat by Turtlejournal January 8, 2009

pork pie top hat 

The sexual act where after raw dog anal sex the woman sits on the mans head and lets the seman spill out into his hair.
My head is cold.

No problem i can give you a pork pie top hat to wear.

sloppy top hat 

The top hat you wear while receiving oral sex.
I went over to your girl's house and I was wearing my sloppy top hat.
sloppy top hat by ExiledZephy January 2, 2017