to look and porn and pop a woody, get some lotion, put a generous amount on your main hand (sometimes other hand if youre looking at porn on internet or computer), grip your penis, then move your hand rapidly up and down the shaft of your penis.
spank the monkey, choke the chicken, beat the meat, yank the yak, masturbate, wank off, whack off, etc.
by sean paul? June 2, 2003
Jacking off is when you take your hand, and grab your cock like there is no freaking tomorrow, make sure you have a firm grip! Move your hand up and down and up and down again and again, if you do it right and long enough, you'll ejaculate all over. Sometimes you want to eat some, so you do. I do it like 3 times a day, and sometimes I'm dry by night, but I love it so much, too bad I can't reach down to give myself a blowjob!
I was jacking off in the bathroom at school and it went "thump, thump, thump" until it just all came out and I was relieved that I let go of my seed.
by Takisha January 1, 2006
rubbing a smooth long cock up and down and all over, usually using some type of lubricant and usually while looking at chicks getting fucked. after jacking off, you cum all over your own hand.
by loves2jack May 26, 2004
1) "Get off the Postman Pat ride, you've been on long enough... JACK, OFF!"
2) "Dude, I am going to jack off."
2) "Dude, I am going to jack off."
by Soiled Undergarment August 15, 2003
Like when i have my period. Or when I'm away, or when he finds out that I'm fucking his hott sexy brother in the next room.
by Pussy got everythang August 20, 2003
1. What a man does when his penis erects into a throbbing, veiny, pulsating, kinetic hard-on, stroking the shaft repeatedly up and down with his hand until the penis barfs up massive amounts of white-nut vomit in either a clean, streaming squirt or in a gelatonous, oozing mass.
2. To make one's dick sneeze, throw up, explode, ejaculate, cough up white blood, splooge, climax, orgasm, erupt, belch, detonate, spew, or spit, possibly on another person's face.
3. A person who amounts to nothing, or should not be taken seriously.
2. To make one's dick sneeze, throw up, explode, ejaculate, cough up white blood, splooge, climax, orgasm, erupt, belch, detonate, spew, or spit, possibly on another person's face.
3. A person who amounts to nothing, or should not be taken seriously.
1. "Boy, I just watched too much Full House, I need to go jack off".
2. ".. and then she got down on her knees and I jacked off all over her face".
3. "Dude, you need to get up off of your ass and quit watching gay porn, you good for nothing jack off".
2. ".. and then she got down on her knees and I jacked off all over her face".
3. "Dude, you need to get up off of your ass and quit watching gay porn, you good for nothing jack off".
by Mr. Friscus February 2, 2010
if you're under 13: you're not cool enough to know what it means. come back when you wake up and its sticky in your danger zone.
if you're over 13: why the FUCK would you need to look up the definition of "jack off?" did your balls not drop yet?
if you're over 13: why the FUCK would you need to look up the definition of "jack off?" did your balls not drop yet?
by un-dumbassify yourself, please January 3, 2010