child anchor

When a young child immobilises you by attatching themselves to either your leg or by sitting on your foot, thus anchoring you to the spot.

Hungry Husband returning home after a day at work: "What d'you mean, dinners not ready"

Wife with child anchor: "Can't you see I'm completely immobilsed, what with this child anchor"

by Elizabeths mum September 20, 2010

hello child

Just being a creep in general

Hello child, get in my van.

by I'm Joking January 25, 2017

Mike Childs

Someone on a social media website, who will comment on any posts stating his/her opinion -tagged or not-. Usually, the opinion causes disagreement and the result is a full blown arguement which ends with Obama shutting the government down again. Mike Childs' post statuses / pictures, and when someone expresses their opinion on it they must prove them wrong.

Person: I hate gays.
Mike Childs: Gays are like by society, it's the government that doesn't like gays.

by Home_Pope May 14, 2014

Bastard child

Justin katerburg

Any child born out out of marriage. Not including Scandinavians.

Toowelloo: hey Justin! Stop compulsively lying about everything. You're a bastard child so it's understandable

Justin: no dude my dad was a pro snowboarder in the 80's

Tyrone: sure. Then he had to quit to deal with the bastard child that you are

Justin: sobs

by Niggly4637 January 6, 2014

child pornography

Something you plant in the office of the guy whose job you want.

Thanks to child pornography I made CEO faster than anyone in company history.

by Sam is a Dick March 3, 2007

love child

A word used when describing a person, comparing their appearance to two individuals. Usually used in an insulting manner.

You look like the love child of Chewbacca and The Fonz.

by crackdealerdownon31st October 28, 2008

bastard child

Child born with unwed parents or with a father that isn't mothers husband.

Martha had an affair with her co-worker and had a bastard child.

by doggy t December 13, 2006