old slang term for sexual relations.
I write separately only because it would be a shame to not quote Shakespeare on this one.
I write separately only because it would be a shame to not quote Shakespeare on this one.
Hamlet: Lady, shall I lie in your lap?
Ophelia: No, my lord.
Hamlet: I mean my head upon your lap.
Ophelia: Aye, my lord.
Hamlet: Or did you think I meant country matters?
Ophelia: I think nothing, my lord.
Hamlet: That's a fair thought, to lie between maid's legs.
Ophelia: No, my lord.
Hamlet: I mean my head upon your lap.
Ophelia: Aye, my lord.
Hamlet: Or did you think I meant country matters?
Ophelia: I think nothing, my lord.
Hamlet: That's a fair thought, to lie between maid's legs.
by cogitheum@mac.com February 22, 2009
Get the country matters mug.To perform the Lorenzo Von Matterhorn, here's what you'll need: basic knowledge of website design and a very unique fake name. So, think of your fake name right now. Have you got it? Good.
Now, select your target, preferably a girl with a real nice phone.
The dialogue that follows should go something like this.
You: "Yeah. It's me."
Girl: "Do I know you?"
You: "I'm Lorenzo Von Matterhorn."
Girl: "Are you, like, famous, or something?"
You: "Yes... You really don't know who I am, do you? What a refreshing change of pace. Nice to meet you..."
Girl: "Shelley."
You: "Shelley. Once again, I'm Lorenzo Von Matterhorn. Spelled like it sounds: two t's. Lorenzo. Von Matterhorn. Ciao."
Then, as soon as you're gone, she gets out her phone and does an internet search for Lorenzo Von Matterhorn. And that's when she discovers a series of fake websites, all devoted to the incredible life of Lorenzo Von Matterhorn. There's a fake business article about Lorenzo, the reclusive billionaire. The fake explorers club newsletter describing his balloon trip to the North Pole as a feat of pure daring and imagination. The fake medical journal featuring a heart-breaking story of doctors telling him penis reduction surgery isn't an option. And by the time you get back...
You: "Hi. Shelley, uh, I hate to be forward, but can I buy you a cup of coffee?"
Girl: "Yes! Please."
You: "What does coffee go for these days? Fifty dollars?"
Girl: "Oh, Lorenzo."
And it is on.
Now, select your target, preferably a girl with a real nice phone.
The dialogue that follows should go something like this.
You: "Yeah. It's me."
Girl: "Do I know you?"
You: "I'm Lorenzo Von Matterhorn."
Girl: "Are you, like, famous, or something?"
You: "Yes... You really don't know who I am, do you? What a refreshing change of pace. Nice to meet you..."
Girl: "Shelley."
You: "Shelley. Once again, I'm Lorenzo Von Matterhorn. Spelled like it sounds: two t's. Lorenzo. Von Matterhorn. Ciao."
Then, as soon as you're gone, she gets out her phone and does an internet search for Lorenzo Von Matterhorn. And that's when she discovers a series of fake websites, all devoted to the incredible life of Lorenzo Von Matterhorn. There's a fake business article about Lorenzo, the reclusive billionaire. The fake explorers club newsletter describing his balloon trip to the North Pole as a feat of pure daring and imagination. The fake medical journal featuring a heart-breaking story of doctors telling him penis reduction surgery isn't an option. And by the time you get back...
You: "Hi. Shelley, uh, I hate to be forward, but can I buy you a cup of coffee?"
Girl: "Yes! Please."
You: "What does coffee go for these days? Fifty dollars?"
Girl: "Oh, Lorenzo."
And it is on.
Did you see that? Barney totally just pulled off The Lorenzo Von Matterhorn. He's bringing the girl up to his room right now!
by lilypotter56 April 19, 2011
Get the The Lorenzo Von Matterhorn mug.Related Words
matter
• matterhorn
• matter baby
• Matter-Of-Fact
• matter fact
• matter-of-crap
• matterbation
• Matterboat
• matterdaddy
• matterize
1.Metallica's 3rd album, considered by some to be the greatest metal album ever. It was also Cliff Burton's last album with Metallica (He died in a tour buss accident shortly after completing the album).
2. The title track of the above album. Probably Metallica's most famous song. The lyrics are about Drug Addiction, refering to the drug (most likely cocaine) as "Master".
2. The title track of the above album. Probably Metallica's most famous song. The lyrics are about Drug Addiction, refering to the drug (most likely cocaine) as "Master".
by Metal Head June 22, 2004
Get the Master Of Puppets mug.When someone in the MOBA game "League Of Legends" plays the champion Master Yi, when this player gets fed in the early game they believe that they can 1v5 the enemy team and proceeds to attempt to. The Master Yi player will most likely fail and blame Crowd Control (CC) and attemp to 1v5 7 more times, thus throwing the game.
Brandon: "Dude yesterday I was playing League of Legends and their Master Yi got so fed and started to carry!"
Jerry: "Did he get Master Yi Syndrome?"
Brandon: "Yeah he ended up throwing the game and letting us win!"
Jerry: "Did he get Master Yi Syndrome?"
Brandon: "Yeah he ended up throwing the game and letting us win!"
by Pancock September 17, 2017
Get the Master Yi Syndrome mug.The term (slang) used for a woman masturbating. It is called Dj mastering because when a woman stimulates her clit her finger move in a circular motion then making the dj master.
“Dude when we were at Jennifer’s party I heard that becky was playing dj master for 2 hours straight”
“Holy shit dude that’s wild”
“Holy shit dude that’s wild”
by GawkityGawk August 17, 2021
Get the Dj Master mug.An expert fisherman.
by The Great Articulator June 15, 2016
Get the master baiter mug.by big_benis_nibba July 23, 2019
Get the Master Yi mug.