EULA (End User License Agreement)

A EULA (End User License Agreement) is a contract a manufacturer makes you sign before they let you buy or lease their product. Products that come with a EULA (pronounced "YOO - lah") are high-tech, big-ticket items: cars, cell phones, appliances, etc. EULAs contain do's & don't's for using a product. Violating the EULA will usually void the warranty.

A EULA is not the same as a TOS (Terms of Service Agreement). A TOS is for a service, not a physical object.

Legally, a EULA gives you permission (gives you a "license") to use the product after you buy it. Presumably, the manufacturer can "revoke" that "permission" at any time, and they will do so by remotely shutting down the product (called "bricking" your product), rendering it inoperable.

The language of a typical EULA includes "hold harmless" clauses to protect the manufacturer from lawsuits. Additionally, you will (usually) be agreeing to let the manufacturer gather personal data about you via the product. This includes your locations, shopping habits, medical information, sexual orientation, etc. A EULA will also usually dictate that you resolve disputes via arbitration (not lawsuits), and stipulate that the arbiter will be hired by the manufacturer (so the arbiter works for the manufacturer, and will do as they say).

EULAs will become more common as modern manufacturers move away from the business model of selling things, and embrace the model of leasing things. That way, "you will own nothing and be happy."

I tries to read the EULA (End User License Agreement) that came with my new cell phone, but it was over 30 pages long, so I just gave up and signed it anyway. I hope that by signing it, I didn't agree to anything too crazy.

by Innocent Byproduct September 10, 2023

But you didn't agree with me THEN

Ope, there it is! Ok. So, you did get it. You just had to spend a couple of days framing it as racism before you pivoted to "Yeah, it's our talking point but you didn't do it back when we were trying to mischaracterize a pretty obvious overdose and some probably poor police training as overt racism!"

A literal bipolar woman "But you didn't agree with me THEN!"

Hym "Tss! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! OH MY GOD! THAT IS HILARIOUS! You fucking clowns are ridiculous! One of you is hot but still ultimately ridiculous individuals, all of you!"

by Hym Iam June 7, 2024

Non Disclosure agreement (contract)

What I call homo-sapiens who are addicted to abscesses.

Person 1: Are you addicted to abscesses?
Person 2: Yes.
Person 1: Non Disclosure agreement (contract)

by LeSouffleDeVersailles January 20, 2025

The Aftertrack Agreement

A spiritually void and grotesque post-fatality ritual enacted by two train drivers who, instead of alerting emergency services, descend into a depraved state of edging-fuelled madness known as gorping. The scene begins with one driver stripping off his hi-vis, slathering himself in DAZ1901 axle grease, and whispering locomotive jargon as if invoking a dark rail deity. The recently deceased body — ideally pregnant in the most abominable variants — becomes the gorp vessel. The act involves intimate interaction with trauma sites, huffing bodily vapors, sliding against exposed abdominal tissue, and softly edging in sync with the rhythmic ding of nearby level crossing bells. The ritual peaks when one driver leaps off the station platform directly onto the body, while the second kneels on the ballast below, mouth agape, ready to catch any expelled viscera, fetus, or gore as a sacred communion of the rail. The act concludes with both men locked in a smegma-slick embrace, whispering “she’s ballast now.” Long-term consequences include bans from crib rooms, permanent pelvic tremors, and unshakable spiritual tinnitus.

Tom: "I didn’t want to do it, mate… I just froze. I was still holding the radio."
Dawko: "You saw her, Tom. She jumped for this. It was meant to be. I’ve never gorped that hard in my life."
Father Eric (emerging silently from the shadows and adjusting his collar): "The Aftertrack Agreement... this is not the way of the pill."

by King of Cum Junction July 26, 2025

The gentleman‘s agreement

Sleeping with someone’s girlfriend behind his back, fully aware he has no clue, and soothing your guilt by inventing a ‘gentleman’s agreement’ in your head because pretending consent exists is easier than admitting you’re just doing what you want.

Bob: What’s going on with Pook? He cool with all this?
Joe: Yeah, we’ve got a gentleman’s agreement.
Bob: A gentleman’s agreement… meaning what, exactly?
Joe: We both date her. We both look out for her.
Bob: So he knows you’re sleeping with her?
Joe: Not exactly.
Bob: Then what agreement is this?
Joe: the gentleman‘s agreement is more of unspoken kind. Mostly spoken by me.

by Kittykat81 December 23, 2025

Gibson Is So Sexy Can We Agree?

Gibson is my favorite person i want to have sex with him :)

lemmie fuck you gibby. Gibson Is So Sexy Can We Agree?

by Sadie Houston:) February 18, 2022

Citing me for things I would never agree with

Just like you're doing to Nietzsche, Jordan. This isn't a reaction from you. It's your entire schtick. And now that thought kids are dead what do you have to say for yourself? NOTHING. How many children need to die for you to succeed in life and in hiding your own shame. I won't let the pathetic dregs you've supposedly saved shield you forever.

Hym "Now you are citing me for things I would never agree with. And for what? To steal my success from me to make a retard molester not wrong to molest a retard? So breeders can pretend they aren't the scum of the earth? It sure as hell isn't to protect kids. They are already dead and their blood is on your hands. All so you can play golden prophet."

by Hym Iam March 19, 2025