pencil neck

When you do a boring job designing anything to do with computers and you make spreadsheets of your bank account, if you think you can buy love, but you're built like a rail post and as about as boring as one, you got tattoos and/or peircings to appear cool, but it only looks like a daisy with a bone sticking through it. When you try to do some remodeling to look like you can do manual labor, but it always looks like a big wreck, when the worst thing you ever did was something you didn't really do, but got blamed for it, when you let people leech off you for months and are too much of a puss to stand up and be a man about it. And when you go to the gym everyone around you including the guys laugh their butts off.

Look at that pencil neck jerk working out, does he really think he looks cool??? And what the hell is sticking out of his nip????

by highclassbizzitch March 3, 2008

Sharpening the Pencil

When a guy inserts his penis into a girls tight pussy and fucks her until they both cum, making the guys penis sharp like a pencil. AKA- Sharpening his pencil.

Guy 1- hey how was your girl last night?
Guy 2- great! i was Sharpening The Pencil, if you know what i mean!
Guy 1- ah you're so lucky!

by BreeTiful1211 February 20, 2011

Putting Lead In Your Pencil

From the Journal Of The Royal Society Of Medicine. To insert a foreign object into ones Urethra for sexual pleasure especially during masturbation. Damn Doctors U got scary black humour.

A 62-year-old man was referred to us from a nursing home by staff concerned that he had apparently passed a small household (AAA size) battery per urethra. The patient was in pain with difficulty in passing urine. Relevant in his past medical history was that one year previously we had endoscopically removed a pen lid from his bulbar urethra.

An X-ray of his pelvis revealed what appeared to be two dense foreign bodies in his urethra. Urethroscopy revealed two AAA size household batteries lodged in his bulbar urethra. On further questioning at discharge, the patient admitted to inserting three AAA sized batteries into his urethra for sexual gratification during masturbation four weeks earlier. The Doctors decided to call it putting lead in your pencil, the age old euphemism for sexual vigour and erections.

by Mengele's lab rat January 12, 2012

pencils

the name given to high school boys who carry a plethora of pencils in their pockets even though their handwriting in practically incomprhendible...they usualy wear fingerless gloves and are obsessive about protecting their eyes from the sun. They enjoy music such as linkin park and rarely answer their mobile phones...

pencils: do you want to listen to some linkin park?
hot chick: um...no thanks..
pencils: ok... i'll just head back to the laboratoy

by ulrik g pod June 21, 2006

Pencil Pusher

Someone who enjoys pushing pencils up their genitals. The hobby rose to prominence in the 1800s, during the industrial revolution, where people could work jobs other than farming. Today, millions, if not billions of men and women participate in this activity. However, it is described to be an incredibly boring task, possibly due to the nature of trends.

After shoving a pencil up his dick, Richard's friends quickly classified him as a Pencil Pusher.

by HitFatYeets January 20, 2018

pencil

Not to be mistaken for Kencil my pencil, it is a handy writing mobobber that can write words, draw things, and can take over our minds at times. Otherwise known as a writer colider.

Kenny thought that a pencil had talked to him before.

or

I grabbed Kencil my pencil and wrote away.

by I am Iron Man April 25, 2006

Pencil dick bug fucker

The sad, but oh so real, phenomena in which your penis is so small the only enjoyment you will ever receive from it will be from screwing bugs.

Girl 1: Do you think I should date Aaron?

Girl 2: Don't bother; he is a pencil dick bug fucker.

by Shmoobs July 18, 2011