Zoe Logic

When something makes absolutely 0 sense. And there’s no telling them otherwise. And when you actually think about what was said. It makes even less sense.

*goes on vacation
“You don’t love me”
“Wow. Zoe logic.”

by martinichio August 25, 2022

Jamie logic

A fact or belief that is remodeled into a new reality, to the benefit of the authority that has implemented such decree.

I just bought this apple for one dollar isn’t that great? Yeah it is, so happy you got a great deal!
So would you like to buy an apple? Sure why not!
That’ll be five dollars. Wait what? Why is that if you got it for one and are trying to sell it for five? That’s just Jamie logic, that’ll be five dollars please!

by Patty b February 6, 2021

PORN LOGIC

When your attracted to the sexy person of the opposite sex that you may or may not even know, no matter what the situation is. It's always going to lead to sex and not just any sex but the hottest wildest best sex ever.

I know you are kind of a stranger to me, but I can't help my porn logic telling me this would be a much better experience if you just take off all your clothes and lets take advantage of this opportunity.

by mastercock January 24, 2023

Cat logic

A phenemenon where cats do something that seems weird to us but somehow makes sense to them

John: Why is your cat sitting on my pizza??
Jack: I don't know man, its a cat logic thing.

by Catloafer March 30, 2023

Rockstar Logic

When the train is the only vehicle you can't destroy in GTA V.

Rockstar logic at it's best

by UltimateDoge July 5, 2021

Cartoon Logic

AKA Cartoon Physics.

A law in cartoons that states that if something impossible would be amusing if it actually happened, then it will happen.

That's not the entire rule, either; see below.

The full definition of Cartoon Logic is as follows:

*Should the character be able to do this?

> Yes No

*Would it be funny if they couldn't?

> Yes No

*They can't do it.

----

*Should the character be able to do this?

Yes > No

*Would it be funny if they could?

> Yes No

*They can do it.

----

*Should the character be able to do this?

> Yes No

*Would it be funny if they couldn't?

Yes > No

*They can do it.

----

*Should the character be able to do this?

Yes > No

*Would it be funny if they could?

Yes > No
*They can't do it.

by Ubeenbamboozledson June 5, 2021

Customer Logic

Throwing all reasoning out the window and being the stupidest fucking moron you can humanly be.

It operates under three basic principles:

1. Complete lack of accountability (even actively refusing to take any)
2. Complete lack of empathy (i.e. sociopathic behavior)
3. Unwarranted self importance (i.e. severe narcissism)

Formal logic:
Premise 1: person parks on No Parking area.
Premise 2: person gets a parking ticket.
Conclusion: if you park on No Parkin areas, you get a parking ticket.

Customer logic:
Premise 1: person parks on No Parking area.
Premise 2: person gets a parking ticket.
Conclusion: OMG IT WAS JUST A FUCKING MINUTE I WILL GO TO THE NEAREST STARBUCKS TO DEMAND TO SPEAK TO THEIR MANAGER AND ASK FOR FREE LATTES FOR LIFE BECAUSE THEY SHOULD'VE TOTALLY WARNED ME ABOUT IT AND WILL SUE EVERYONE BECAUSE MY PARKING TICKET IS EVERYBODY ELSE'S FAULT.

by MrDanteSesma December 16, 2019